Grinnellingham

Highlights II

2006-12-20T01:42:00.000-08:00

How Aboot a Party? Canada Themed Birthday Celebration for Christena:
Molly, Amelia, Ryan, and I know pure joy. Holla! Happy to Be Alive Hour Party:
The finest Loose Second has ever seen hosted by Ryan and me. Waltz:
Ryan, Nilesh, and I. Typical shot of me- Nilesh is likely very uncomfortable. Nilesh prefers the sparkling grape to actual Champagne. Meredith, Ryan, XTena, and I before the Pre-Waltz festivities.

Highlights I

2006-12-20T01:37:00.000-08:00

Halloween:
The dead male hooker to my truck driver. Forever and always. Scooby Doo was also born on Loose Second. Claire (as Fred) told us the gang had been planning this for months. The Scooby costume is rented. Winnie, Molly, Britt, Katy, Christena, Anna, Meredith, Erin, and Amelia are from my floor. They were "The Wizard of OZ." There was wine in Dorothy's basket and Meredith's tail looked like a dildo. Christena as Glenda. Isn't this picture sweet?New Orleans:
Anna, Neo, Erin, and I waiting for our delicious beignets at Cafe Du Monde in New Orleans. This is the Adult Superstore, the closest adult themed retail venue to Grinnell College. We go here at every opportunity. October 7, 2006: 10/10 on 10/7
I call this the night we almost died.

A letter to myself

2006-12-18T17:04:00.000-08:00

Dear Margie,

Remember when you were a first semester first year (just like how they say it in Canada and in Harry Potter) at Grinnell and you lived on Loose Second with Kathleen in the corner room next to the fire escape? Well, that's where you lived. And that’s who you lived with. You liked living there a lot because most everyone was older and you didn’t have to deal with first year bullshit. Loose also hosted good parties and everyone on the floor thought you and Ryan should get married because you spent so much time together even though it could never happen in real life. Other people who lived on your floor who were cool are Christena, Nilesh, Adam, Britt, Meredith, Claire, Anna, Katy, Les, and Molly.

At this point, you have been in Iowa for four months. The semester is over and you’re on the plane on the flight home for Winter Break. Your favorite foods in the JRo (Joe Rosenfield '25 Student Center) are tater bucks with ranch dressing, fruit of the forest pie, pita pockets with hummus and cucumber and red onion from the vegan station, and, on occasion, the Fettuccini Alfredo from the pasta bar.

You are the Assistant Design Editor as well as a Sports Writer on staff at the Scarlet & Black and you occupy your time by decorating your dorm room, monitoring the Stonewall Resource Center’s Library, throwing wonderful bashes, bowling on an all men’s league of townies, and illin’ it with Ryan, Christena, Meredith, Kathleen, Claire, Nilesh, Adriane, Adam, Katy, and Anna. You also do homework. The classes you took were Intermediate Spanish, which you hated with a burning passion. As soon as you completed the oral final you vowed never to speak the language again unless of course you found yourself in a hostage situation and you were the only one able to communicate with the criminals. You’re Gender and Women’s Studies class was profess-ed by Rita Alfonso, a militant feminist with steel-toed boots and chin hair. She seemed to like your papers (except probably your final one which was a feminist critique of tampons.) First year tutorial with Sarah P. was fine. Kelsey, Ryan, Greg, Thomas, Jacob, Mary, Leah, Caitlin, and Liza were in your tutorial. You particularly liked sociology because it gave you a chance to make other people uncomfortable i.e. encouraging the reclaiming of the word "cunt." Plus, you got to sit next to Ryan and complain about all the privileged kids from the suburbs of Chicago who were very out of touch with reality.

Several highlights include but are not limited to: talking on the cell phone to friends and family in the nast co-ed bathtubs, the ReNew Orleans house gutting trip you took over fall break with Evan, Rachel, Adam, Anna, Fai, Jessica, Erin, Neo, and Ryan, Halloween (you were a truck driver and Ryan was your dead male hooker- you also went to Daniel Carroll’s Pumpkin Farm even though he hates gay people,) the word “Holla” and the “Holla, Happy to Be Alive Hour Party” which you hosted on Loose Deuce with Ryan, Sleepovers in the pit with Ryan, the Pub, Thanksgiving weekend, and being done with finals. You really like Grinnell and even though you were kind of sad about being in Iowa at the beginning, you really think it’s going to work out fine, as long as Ryan doesn’t transfer.

In the Des Moines airport today you found Fai wandering around the gift shop looking really dazed and confused and you sat next to Amanda Gay who was illin' it at the Delta Connection gate on her way to Russia. She shared the cookies with you that her housemate, Chris made for her. Ryan texted you several times throughout the morning because he took the train home to Colorado from Ottumwa; you saw him off after you shared nachos and “strawritas” from “Fiesta Cantina.” You noticed that no one working at “Fiesta Cantina” was Latino/a. This bothered you a little.

When you get off the plane in Bellingham, your mom will probably be crying because she’s so happy you’re home and you’ll give both of your parents a big hug because you haven’t seen them for four months. Then, you’ll all go out to lunch and then cut down a Christmas tree and then eat Chinese in celebration of shortauntiej's graduation from WWU . YAY. You’re going home. Holla!

Thanksgiving. Holla.

2006-12-11T11:48:00.000-08:00

This is my beautiful Grinnell Family. Not to be confused with my real family that called three times on Thanksgiving Day and passed the phone around the table. The turkey was 21.6 lbs and delicious. I could tell Kathleen was a bit nervous (she was responsible for cooking the turkey) because she set her alarm for 8 AM to ensure the seasoning was just right. The oven was impossibly small but the turkey was covered in rosemary and tin foil by 10:05. I literally shoved it in for her. She basted every half hour during the second half of cooking and she must have run up and down the first and second floor stairs 30 times over the course of the morning looking for assorted ingredients. Rumor has it, she jacked a pot from Read or Haines Hall for the gravy.

I think the tablescape speaks for itself. Auntie Joanie's turkey was a really fun, really festive touch.

I had originally planned to cover the entire table with a single beige plastic banquet-size table cloth that I found atthe Hobby Lobby (not Shack like I suggested in a previous post) while I was lost in Des Moines. It was not until I realized the table was twice as long as the cloth (the guest list was up to 17 at this point) that I freaked and started cutting things in half. Les took me to Wal-Mart at 2:30 for a second tablecloth and a meat thermometer. There were three patterns of plastic cloth left in the entire town of Grinnell. I chose red thinking the "Happy Birthday" motif may detract from the orange and red leaves I picked up in the city. Before dinner, Spring, Christena, and I found a massive bag of balloons left over from a hall study break. We blew them all up, even the green and purple ones that detered from. This is Britt, Christena, Suzanne, Spring, Les, Brian, and I blowing up balloons in the first floor lounge. We ate at 3:30. To Britt's HORROR, six extra, unaccounted for people from North Campus showed up with a massive bowl of chow mein and a pineapple and honey glazed ham. Britt got especially pissed when they sat at the decorated table instead of the supplementary one we threw together just after they arrived. As the hostess, Britt encouraged everyone to introduce themselves and tell the group for what part of the meal we were responsible. I sat near Les, Kathleen, Christena, Adam, Amanda, Will, and Nilesh. A good time was had by all.

After dinner, we sat around in our PJs, ate leftovers, watched Little People Big World, and Pieces of April, a Thanksgiving classic about a young woman charged with cooking dinner for her estranged family.

Friday, instead of “buying nothing” as suggested by our favorite chapter of Free the Planet (FTP’s president and vice president both live on the third floor of Loose,) Nilesh, Spring, Christena, Britt, and I drove to Jordan Creek Mall!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! to find formal wear for Winter Waltz. We were almost stranded in Grinnell when Britt’s car broke down on 6^th Ave. right in front of Spring’s house. We called Campus Security for a jump, but fortunately the car started (although we were fully prepared to get out and push her Volvo the 55 miles to J Creek.) We hit Cheesecake Factory for lunch then split up for the afternoon. Actually, it was just Nilesh that peaced. The rest of us went to Torrid and took advantage of a really incredible sale. The mall wasn’t as crazy as I expected- the M.I.L.F.s and the sexy preppies and their beautiful Arian children were out in responable numbers but they weren't overwhelming. On our way home, we stopped at Hyvee and picked up some ingredients for Thanksgiving II. Christena was kind of disappointed with the non-traditional green bean casserole served the day before so she bought infinity cans of beans and made a second pan. We ate half of the pan together and then Christena ate the rest that night after Irish Car Bombs. I made spaghetti because it sounded good, Britt made delicious corn cheese mush casserole, and we reheated all the leftovers we could find. Three weeks later, the massive bowl of gravy is still in the top of the fridge. I may dare someone to eat it tonight. You know, just to break up the monotony of hell week. Sunday evening, we TPed Noah's room. This is what the room looks like if you are lying on the floor on your side outside of his room. This is the first picture of Ryan back on Loose Second after break. He missed many wonderful Loose antics while he was gone. Sucka.

A Collection of Photographs from SOA Watch

2006-11-24T18:58:00.000-08:00

This is what the road between Grinnell, IA and Columbus, GA looks like (Mer took this picture on the way down.) According to MapQuest, it's 1,040 miles. Since it's fall, the trees were really beautiful and orange/red. We drove mostly at night so I really only saw Georgia, Tennessee, and Kentucky in the day time.This is our campsite in Pine Mountain, GA in the AM. You can tell it's morning because things are zipped up and the air looks cold. We slept on the ground in these four GORP tents- mine was the second from the right- 45 miles outside of Columbus. I slept in the Volvo wagon the second night because the ground was too cold and too uncomfortable. I was the only one to take a shower in four days. I seriously hate camping. HATE ITI believe the bottom on the right is Leigh's. The main stage is where all the musicians and speakers were located. At Saturday's rally, we sat on this small patch of grass next to a garbage can for five hours. SOA Watch, the organization, spent an incredible amount of money to ensure everyone could hear what was happening from the stage. Large speakers were erected all throughout the protest site. Most of the offerings from the stage were in both English and Spanish and interpreters wearing special badges walked around to ensure everyone's message was fully accessible.

The watch tower was set up to the left of the stage. Military police and local police personnel lined the perimeter of the crowd. Helicopters flew overhead the second day of the protest in an attempt to drown out the speakers and spot people crossing the line. Everyone was video recorded when they entered the site.This picture really captures the political and social diversity of the crowd. Nuns and punks marched together in solidarity. Many students from Jesuit schools were in attendance (they were flown in by their schools and put up in hotel rooms) because the SOA was initially questioned when two Jesuit priests and several Catholic missionaries were murdered in South America at the hands of SOA graduates. The protest was like nothing I have ever attended. I plan to go every year I am able.

The South. Georgia, Alabama, Tennessee, and Kentucky. Holy crap.

My 50th Post and Counting: SOA Watch 2006

2006-11-22T13:06:00.000-08:00

We left Grinnell a little before 11 on Thursday night. Leigh lent her Volvo wagon to the cause and Sarah, Evan and I were fortunate enough to get to ride in her car. It's the perfect protest ride because it's a little hippie but still really comfortable and safe. She drove the first four hours and a few inbetween and both Evan and I took turns the remainder of the way. Our car followed Sara Lu's van the entire way- we had no map, crappy MapQuest directions, and absolutely no common sense. Emily, who caught a ride home with us, wondered how we managed to follow someone for 1,100 miles. Ha, honestly?... not sure. We drove through Illinois, Kentucky, Tennessee, and through a bunch of Georgia. Columbus is practically in Alabama so one wrong turn and we were there too. The drive was a bit more than 18 hours. We stopped almost every hour because every hour at least one person had to use the restroom. We hit mostly truck stops. The one in Kentucky where we stopped at 9 AM smelled like clean trucker and sausage gravy.

The campsite where we slept was in Pine Mountain, about 45 miles from Columbus. I hope we got a good deal on the site because it was a pain in the ass to drive to and from the protest. Also, the camp ground was not especially enthusiastic about hosting a group of college students. We had showers (I kid you not, I was the only person to take one in the four days we were gone) and GORP, the college's outdoor recreation group, gave us tents and sleeping bags. Ryan let me borrow his but while I was in the bathroom, Evan fell asleep in it. SICK. I was really freezing and uncomfortable on the ground so I slept in the front seat of Leigh's car the second night.

Our first night, we walked a mile from the conference center to a concert at the HoJo. I bought a Peace flag and hugged Dotty Dale and her son hello. I met her second granddaughter, Lucy, on Saturday at the rally. Half of Columbus, Georgia is historically preserved and charming while the other half is a typical army town. Saturday morning we attended an orientation session at the convention center and listened to several speakers, including the Venezuelan Ambassador, who discussed the current needs of the people of Latin America and steps many countries have taken to withdraw officials from the SOA. Each of us was given a bright pink piece of paper with our legal rights printed on both sides. We were instructed to keep them in our pockets throughout the weekend should we run into trouble with the police. People who intentionally cross the line and people who accidently step over face the same legal reprocussions.

Most of the action takes place right outside Fort Benning. Saturday's rally consisted of speakers and musicians and I must have hit every vendor and organization's table four times. I got some really good resources, a shirt and some buttoms. The only food on site was a few tables of BBQ and Beans and Rice set up by people living in the low income apartments on the base. The New York chapter of SOA Watch also had a table offering fresh bagels and cream cheese. Dotty pointed me in the direction of the bagel stand- just two down from the "pee standing up, for women" booth. In addition to the "pee standing up, for women" tool, they were selling the "Diva Cup." http://www.divacup.com/. I was really impressed with the idea and according to Christena, they were big in Grinnell this summer. The rally lasted nearly six hours and in the early evening, each car split for dinner. We found a really awesome Mexican grocery and deli where the waitress encouraged us to speak Spanish. I had two really good, really authentic tostadas. I bought Susan's dinner because she didn't have her money. She owes my $9. Ima email her tonight.

I was barely standing by the time we got back to the convention center for workshops. Susan and I took a nap instead and then encouraged our group to head back to the camp site. Sunday's vigil was one of the most incredible experiences of my life. There were over 20,000 people at the edge of the line. In addition to several speakers, Emily Saliers from the Indigo Girls sang us a song about revolution and Susan Sarandon's sister, who is a nun, read a statement about achieving peace with justice. The actual vigil started at 11 AM. Each person is encouraged to carry a white cross bearing the name of a victim of the human rights violations committed by graduates of the school. Everyone present marches in a circle eight people deep. One person on the stage sings out the name of an individual and after each name, people raise a hand or a cross and respond with "presente" meaning the spirit of the person lost is present among the people gathered at Fort Benning. Some names that were sung were not names at all but instead "Unidentified person from _____" or "Unborn child of _____ from _____." When our part of the procession made it to the wall, I placed my cross among the thousands of others on the fence. I watched several people cross over. They were immediately handcuffed and taken into custody. One of the hardest parts of the whole experience was feeling the presence of the military and civilian police. Everyone was filmed upon entering the site and a watch tower was erected between the fense and the main stage. We left the vigil just as the helicoptors began to fly overhead muffling the speakers on the main stage and looking for people crossing the line.

I am so so glad I was able to make the trip. I know I'll travel to Columbus again next year and I'd love it if I could get a few Bellingham friends to come along. I ran into Dotty several times and I sat with Chris, the older woman I sit next to in Gender and Women's Studies after the procession. The night before she had the opportunity to reunite with the women with whom she shared a cell last spring when she served her sentence for crossing. Two of the women were crack addicts now clean and working in the city.

Grinnell has afforded me many great opportunities already- it's only been three months. I got a packet about a possible trip to NOLA during Winter Break. I'll have to discuss it with my parents.

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving so I prepared the napkins for the tablescape this evening as Adriane, Britt, Kathleen, Les, and Christena chatted and cut veggies. I'll post Thanksgiving Day pictures.

I got a package from Grandma and Papa today- dunkers and sugar cookies. YAY! Old people write the best notes. I think it's because they were really forced to dig deep back in the day when telephone and email was not an option. They're getting two corgi puppies in December, just in time for Christmas. I'm coming home in three weeks regardless of whether or not my finals are done. Hamilton Travel is picking me up at 5 AM on Saturday, December 16.

12-20-84

2006-11-22T11:37:00.000-08:00

Last week, I turned in my second semester registration card. It had toothpaste all over it from an unfortunate cap malfunction. I told the woman at the registrar's office when she said my card smelled minty that the brand was Colgate and that I was sorry. The women who work at the registrar's office look like pageant mother's. I'm sure they are- the desk job is just a way to supplement their daughter's winnings.

My Second Semester Schedule
A List By Margie Scribner

1. Introduction to Political Science
2. Technique in Sculpture
3. Literary Analysis
4. Introduction to Statistics

It's Spanish free but a bit more challenging than this semester. My math teacher is a woman which is good because the high school math teachers I liked best were also women- by liked best I mean I got A's in their classes. For a Sociology major, I'll have to take a 200 level Stats class at some point.

I went to Georgia [see latest blog for details on my trip to the School of the America's Protest]. Before I left, I got this really awesome care package from Auntie Joanie. It had baked goods (of the banana and chocolate chip loaf and muffin variety), a book of Paris Hilton Paper Dolls, a "Would you rather...?" book (For example: Would you rather get drunk dialed by Ghandi or by Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.?), a jar of fortune cookies for an insanely funny reason, and a stand up turkey made of card board and tissue paper for our Thanksgiving table scape. It was easily one of the most well thought out packages I've ever received. The card she included had a plate of turkey and sides covered in saran wrap and on the inside it said something about saving me a plate. Next year, I'm MOST DEF coming home for the holiday. I asked my Dad how many would be around our table this year. He said 18. Then I asked him how many people should be around our table. He said 19.

Britt, Kathleen, and I went to Wal-Mart yesterday to shop for our turkey and sides. We're feeding 15 tomorrow. Dad sponsored the turkey and I'm in charge of the table scape. Kim, our Resident Life Coordinator, got a fall flower delivery from her mother. The paper turkey and the flowers will be our centerpieces. All Wal-Mart had left in the way of Thanksgiving flare was paper plates and napkins with blue scarecrows on them. I opted out of those and instead picked up a bunch of stuff for 90% off at the Hobby Shack in Des Moines after I dropped Ryan off at the airport.

We left at 1:30 for the airport and hung out at Jordan Creek Mall until his 6:30 flight. On our way to the city, we stopped at the Lion's Den. The day patrons are always a lot different then the night patrons at adult shops- it's not always a good different. Ryan used the bathroom there. I would have rather gone outside next to the highway where I wouldn't run the risk of contacting some sort of sexually transmitted disease. It was hard to leave him at the airport. Until the SOA protest, we hadn't really spent any amount of time apart since the beginning of September. Ryan, since I know you're reading at this from your own room in Colorado right now, I trust you are eating Cheeseburger Mac and that you laughed a little when you read the word hard. I miss you HELLA so you should just come home right now.

Even though Ryan drew me a map of exactly how I was to get back to Grinnell, I got lost. I wasn't actually lost, it turns out, but I still asked for directions from people in line at the Hobby Shack. Iowa's highways are really hard to figure out so their was a lot of sighing, pointing, and head shaking. On my way back, I picked up some delicious Taco Bell. All my classes for today were cancelled. Meredith, Christena, and I went to Amanda and Chris' last night for a small fiesta. Then-I went to the Pub. Come to find out, I look a lot like a 16 year old Christena. 12-20-84. That's my new birthday. I was the only first year in the Pub and it felt glorious. It's in the basement of this pizza restaurant and it reminds me a lot of a pirate ship. Since I knew/recognized almost everyone there (including RLC Kim and her husband Randy) I felt really comfortable.

Ryan and I finished Angel's in America last week. The entire mini series was six hours. It was really good and I really liked Meryl Streep's characters. She played Ethel Rosenberg and a Mormon mother named Hannah Pitt. I also really liked Mary Louise Parker's character (she was also Mormon).

We saw Rhonda Fisher, our Soc professor, at Jordan Creek Mall at the "I <3 Dogs" kiosk. Apparently her daughter owns and runs it but I wouldn't be surprised if Rhonda had a pretty strong hand in the operation as well.

Ugg v. Ugh

2006-11-13T13:09:00.000-08:00

I tried to reread the entire play this weekend in Spanish. What I should have done was make flashcards of all the vocabulary words and just skimmed like you do in middle school. But enough about me doing crappy on another Spanish test- the weekend was good and I got a package from home today. P.S. AWESOME! I'll be looking for it, shortauntiej. I finally scheduled a time to meet with my advisor about next semester's classes. I don't think she'll let me take Coaching Methods, Outdoor Leadership, or Ribbon Dancing like I want to but I'm going to fight as hard as I can for them.

The Rep Yo Coast Party turned out so well, I think we're going to have another one in a few weeks. We spilled a full beverage cup on an office chair and the floor lamp tilts now so I'm going to insist on holding the next bash in a lounge with not-nice things in a building that I don't live in so I don't have to clean up after everyone the next morning. Saturday afternoon, Ryan, Molly, Christena, and I went to this really cool Negro Spiritual Concert starring a classically trained Negro Spiritual vocalist who works in Burling Library. Ryan and I are writing papers on the concert for extra credit. Technically we only stayed for half; 0ur thought was that the second half was probably very similar to the first (which we were late for.) Ryan wanted to "shake his booty" at Harris Saturday night so we made an appearance but for the most part, the evening was pretty tame. Multi Culti Manor hosted the dance- they played really good music and before the girls in Ugg boots showed up with their boyfriends, everyone danced.

Ryan and I came back to Loose, ordered a pizza, and watched Angels in America until 2. It's a six part show so we'll watch the rest of it this week. All I did Sunday was study and shower. I also watched the Amazing Race in the first floor lounge. It smelled a lot less like beer and throw up last night than it did yesterday morning.

UGH. I'm so tireddddddddd. I may have to write another blog tonight to make up for the crappiness of this one. I've tried to refrain from commenting on the quality of my blog in a blog but I think the sentiment "UGH" accurately describes what it's like to go to college so I think I'll keep it in. "UGH" is also the sound I make when I haul my laundry up and down three flights of stairs. But alas, I'm out of underwear.

Nap Time.

2006-11-10T12:36:00.000-08:00

It's snowing here. My Spanish professor was sick today so she sent in the new prof fresh off the plane from Spain. She completely freaked out at the sight of snow and I'm pretty sure she didn't understand what I meant when I said she should probably just hibernate this winter. Maybe she did but either way she thinks I'm a freak. The whole Spanish department does but I'm cool with it because after December 15, I'm not going to speak Spanish ever again. Even if I visit CatTed and Fran in Spain when they elope in three years.

We got our paychecks today and the paper turned out well. I designed the page for my business profile; it's the only one in the paper with the S&B logo in the dead center. I accidentally copy and pasted it there when they- SURPRISE- asked my design an ad three minutes before I was going to peace for the night. Oops. At the critique on Sunday night, there's no doubt Mark, the graphics editor, is going to ask me if I "meant to do that" even though he knows perfectly well that it was an honest mistake.

Christena is driving Scott, Ryan, and I to an outlet mall near Iowa City this afternoon. Since I'm returning the ridiculously expensive North Face jacket I bought online last weekend, I might buy a vest at Old Navy and find something else online next week. Really, I just like riding out of town in the backseat of cars. Especially Kelly's because it's so comfortable.

Kathleen is sleeeeeeeeping right now so I can't eat the Honey Chex Mix I bought at the Grille after Spanish. She had a hard week. So much reading, so little sleeping. My week was pretty bad too. Not for any particular reason, it was just really stressful and I feel like I'm behind in Spanish even though I've read the play about the school for the blind and watched the movie about the kids with osteosarcoma. Actually, I think I know why I'm in a funk. It's because all the material we read/see/discuss is extremely depressing.

On a lighter note, we started the hip hop unit in tutorial and Professor Purcell used the term "gangsta rap" 10 plus times in class yesterday. Tonight, Ryan and I are hosting a Rep Yo Coast Tutorial Party in Loose Pit. We'll listen to h-core rhymes, which I have hand selected from my own extensive collection of hip hop and gangsta rap (I went through a weird phase this summer,) eat pizza, and play games. It's sure to be off the chain. We've already had to move the location because BiFocal is hosting its own cocktail party in our first-choice locay.

My "p" key is really messed up. I probably won't be able to type "p" words soon.

The train is going by. Grinnell is so weird.

On NOT Crossing the Line in Georgia

2006-11-08T18:31:00.000-08:00

This man,
lost the race today; Doug Erickson and his super forces (i.e. Jesus, Cornwall Church, the Diehl Fords) proved too powerful for young Jasper and his team of liberal visionaries. Figures were close- J Mac had just over 47% of the vote- so he's not exactly depressed. I called the MacSlarrows this afternoon and they seemed fine. They were eating and mentally preparing for tonight's Dixie Chicks concert; both Rachel and her older sister, Heather, are back in town for the event. The campaign is over; it must feel very surreal. My god, his face was on a bumbersticker and plastered all over stranger's yards.

The Campus Dems are pretty proud of themselves too. The way they're celebrating right now, one would think they were single handedly responsible for usurping the Republican majority in the House and Senate. Rumsfeld is out too and it's probably something they did. They phoned during and after my nap on Tuesday- for the last two weeks they've been merciless in their "Vote or Die" efforts. I heard they actually killed three kids this year using only five, round Campus Dem stickers and a Dan Carroll yard sign. I voted absentee in Washington because I had too much invested personally in Whatcom County. I'll vote in Iowa in 2008 and really make things happen.

Jayber Crow, a really REALLY good folk/country/alt band from the Twin Cities played for us last night at Bob's Underground Coffee House. I bought a CD of their live recordings. They've been touring the Midwest in their van for several years now and I spoke to them after the show about the likelihood of them driving West this spring. They said they would love to make the trip but they would need a place to stay. I offered them my parent's house and our shed for a concert venue. We shall see if anything comes of it. I gave them our home phone number and address as well as my parent's social security numbers. Ha. Not really. I actually downloaded Jayber Crow's "Oh My God When I Drop Dead" last April before my first EVER trip to Grinnell. I listened to it as I flew over Iowa, the place I knew would be my home away from my parent's home for the next four years. Their second to last song of the night was that one. It was incredible to hear it performed live.

Sure enough, next week I will be traveling to the School of the Americas (renamed the "Western Hemisphere Institute for Security Cooperation" in 2001) at Fort Benning, Georgia with 20 or so students from Grinnell PLUS an older woman- she has attended for the last nine years- that I sit next to every other day in Gender and Women's Studies. Last year, she was arrested for crossing "the line" and served six months in federal prison. I won't be crossing "the line" this year even though you get to sleep a lot in prison. We'll be driving down Thursday evening and we'll return before classes on Monday. The drive is about 18 hours.

I wrote a business profile for this week's issue of the Scarlet & Black. The RadioShack/Music Shop has been owned and operated by Vicky and Dave Elliott since 1978. It was a painfully uncomfortable interview. That's the last newspaper story I'm writing. Ever. I had two OTHER papers due this week and I haven't really slept. Sunday and Monday night I worked in the lounge to finish my work. Alicia left an entire bag of Honey Chex Mix on the kitchen table Monday night. Those little crackers were my saving grace.

Karen, the Custodian from Hell, pulled yet another monster move last weekend. The Campus Repubs posted signs in every bathroon stall on campus giving small pieces of information about every candidate in the Iowa election. Dylan, from Loose Second North, edited the poster in one bathroom on our floor with a "He doesn't like gay people" next to Carroll's summary. The next morning, Karen took it upon herself to add "Check your Bible, He doesn't hate the person, just the act" and left it up for everyone to read. We've decided not to report the incident but Adam thinks we should post one of those hot pink "Queer Safe Space" posters on her closet until things improve. Also, she almost threw away my new Starbucks mug that I left on the kitchen counter. I saved it, though.

From Mom

2006-11-04T15:30:00.000-08:00

A voicemail message from my mother:

"We sure enjoy your blog... uh...*long pause*... especially the last diagram... very detailed. Thanks for the information. Okay. Bye Sweetie."

We watched South Park on the roof of the loggia today. I was laughing really hard at something inappropriate from the NAMBLA (North American Man/Boy Love Association) Episode when all of a sudden, some kid from the yearbook standing on the ground below asked to take our picture for the book. YAY!

So I gave my "college is like camping" theory back in September. Now, as we enter into November I find that life on Loose Second is looking more and more like life at a Bed & Breakfast. We don't have television in our rooms, we must walk down the hall to the bathroom we share with our neighbors (some of whom are easier to get along with than others and many of whom hail from different parts of the country), and we share the responsibility of refilling the floor ice cube tray when it is empty. I like it here. A lot.

The drag show was pretty good. The party was ok; Ryan, Neo, Erin, and I were the reason it was such a success. Ask anyone.

Your vulva

2006-11-03T18:18:00.000-08:00

If you don't want to feel like an IDIOT like me at your next masterbation workshop, you'll memorize the parts of your vulva. This is a vulva:

HAIRCUT!!!!!!!!!!!!

2006-11-03T13:08:00.000-08:00

I forgot to mention that I made my first ever trip to Taco John's last night. It's like Taco Bell only cleaner and not as tasty (am I right, Kathryn Frasier?) Taco Bravo's were only 99 cents because it was Thursday. What an incredible deal.

Katy drove Christena, Ryan, and I. I treated Christena in exchange for A HAIRCUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YAY! It looks really good; it's shorter and I think I look very hot/sexy. She cut it in the men's bathroom on our floor. I was beginning to look like all the members of The Beatles from the album "Let it Be." Later that night, Molly, Clare, Anna, AND someone else got their hair cut too. Christena used scissors stolen from the print making studio because she knows she has not been fully compensated for her $60 material fee.

This is me as John, me as Paul, me as Ringo, and me as George before I got my haircut.

Ryan and I are walking to McNally's- McNally's is to Haggens as Hyvee is to Cost Cutter- in an hour and 19 minutes. We're making Hambuger Helper, Cheeseburger Mac tonight. McNally's has a Mediterranean olive bar and case full of imported cigars. Grinnell, IA is like an infomercial in that "the views expressed may not represent the views of this station (state)."

Karen, our custodian, is a heartless MONSTER

2006-11-01T12:36:00.000-08:00

Yeah, I skipped them. I don't regret it, though. I slept through the first one and I knew exactly what I was doing. The second? Not my proudest moment but that beast of a Spanish composition had to be written and there was simply no other way. Two classes down, I hauled ass to Spanish, the one class I can never EVER miss no matter how profusely I'm bleeding out of my head. All I contributed the ENTIRE class was "Los limones son agrios." "The lemons are sour." I get to the end of the period and come to find out, the paper's not due until viernes (Friday.) Bummer. I will be checking the revised syllabus from now on, thank you Profesora Valentin. You're right, checking before class would have saved me a lot of trouble.

Halloween was relatively uneventful. Ryan and I made a Wal-Mart run- Britt drove us at midnight in her Volvo- and then ate Valveeta Shells and Cheese using XTena's dishes. The trip reminded me of driving around in CatTed's Volvo, "Lola" (although Britt's Volvo is named "Vulva") for days and days listening to Dave Matthews Band and Busta Rhymes. We would usually have coffee from Avalino's and then sit in the car at a beach because I hate beaches because of their annoying sand. I miss the ocean a lot. I miss every kind of water, actually- lake, ocean, river, stream, drainage bed, puddle. There really isn't any water in Iowa. Rachel, Jordan, Kelly, and I had good conversations at Birch Bay and Lake Padden and near puddles because water is so condusive to good conversation. Naked.

I talked to CatTed on the phone yesterday several times because she lives down a really scary alley on State St. and she needed someone to keep her company during her walk up to campus. Also, I haven't talked to her for a billion fafillion years and I miss her a lot. She walks the with a flashlight alone most nights but she says the walk up the hill to WWU is making her ass shrink so it's worth it. FRAN'S COMING BACK TO AMERICA in six weeks. She's really excited. So am I. All I want to do is take him up to Vancouver and stop at IKEA so he can eat delicious meatballs and drink lingonberry juice. Beth, her roomie who she met while counseling church camp a few summers ago, is having second thoughts about letting him stay at their casa (house.) I say, Beth can move in with CatTed's parents for six weeks. That is all.

Newspaper was kind of fun last night. I mean, not fun like I was having fun, but fun, like it was bearable for a change. I swapped music with Christena near the end of the night and I introduced Pat, a veteran of the Marine Corps who is like 24, to Regina Spector. He seemed to really like her and not just because her last name, Spector sounds like sphincter. I got to lay out the Drag Extravaganza page. My headline: "Stuffed shirts, stuffed pants to stuff seats at Drag Extravaganza." The show should be kind of bad but few of my friends from Multicultural Manor will be performing. Tips earned by the kings and queens are going towards offsetting the cost of AIDS/HIV testing that will be offered on campus next week.

This weekend, Rachel from NOLA is hosting a little get together at her off-campus residence. Ryan and I are excited because it will be a reunion of sorts for our Alt Break group. It's been awhile since we've all been in the same place at the same time laughing about stupid things that make others squirm. During our Real World/Road Rules Challenge Make-Up Marathon tonight (which we were forced to watch in the smoking lounge of Cleveland Hall because everyone else on this campus was watching Greys Anatomy in groups of 30+,) I saw this commercial where a bunch of people get roaches dumped on their heads. I miss New Orleans and roaches. On my arm.

So in Spanish, we're reading this drama called "En La Ardiente Oscuridad" about a group of students that are attending a school for the blind. It's really terrible and I don't want to read it any more. Also, the book has words that are not in my Spanish dictionary. I'm convinced the author keeps inventing words; Merriam-Webster simply can not keep up.

Uncle Jack sent me a really awesome Starbuck's care package yesterday. He wants me to grind and test the varieties of beans he has sent thus far so he can send my favorite of the two next month. He insists on sending fair trade, organic because he knows that I am a bit of a hippie. I attended both the masturbation workshop and the School of the America's Vigil information session on Tuesday. The workshop was fine although I did not qualify for the door prize because I couldn't name all the parts of the vulva. Needless to say, I was quite disappointed in myself so I added a little note next to the unmarked diagram on the quiz- "It's not because I don't care." I hope to attend the protest in Georgia on November 17. The School of the America's is a military training academy on the Fort Benning Military Base. Latin American military officials are trained with American tax dollars at the SOA and when they return to their countries of origin they commit atrocious human rights violations against their own people. The US has never acknowledged their role in this and the school continues to thrive. Dotty and Al Dale will be there too. They've attended the vigil since it began 20 years ago during the Cold War. I love them.

My skin is really dry. So is Kathleen's. Our coastal reared skin is FREAKING OUT.

Also, Karen the custodian on Loose Second threw away my pumpkins yesterday without consulting me. I was pissed.

Call it H Ween if you nasty

2006-10-29T21:01:00.000-08:00

Ryan is the dead hooker to my truck driver. It was really obscene, realistic, awesome, and unique. I tied rope around his wrists and ankles and smeared fake blood all over his face and neck. The bruises look real but they're in fact Estee Lauder. He covered his head with glitter hair spray (indoors! we were almost asphyxiated) and I drew on a mustache and beard with brown eye liner. The condom I stapled to the back of his shirt was especially classy. As you can see, the purple soft ball shorts fit like a glove. I'm giving Meredith the jacket. She fell in love with it. I'm not sure why. In Grinnell, you celebrate Halloween the Saturday before the event. The most popular costume this year was easily "Flava Flav." Dead Crocodile Hunter, Steve Irwin was the second most common/distasteful. Actually, Adam dressed up as a blind man. That was really offensive.

Our pumpkins turned out really well too. I carved a vagina and a scary face and Ryan carved a penis and a scary face (not pictured.) I've had several people come up to me asking if that's actually what my vagina looks like. It was really hard to work all the layers in- it's not a good "stand alone" piece but with the other pumpkin, it makes perfect sense.

This one goes out to Shortauntiej

2006-10-27T13:31:00.000-07:00

Last night, Ryan and I borrowed Christena's car and drove out to Carroll's Pumpkin Farm. It was the first time either of us had driven in two months. I picked two pumpkins from the actual patch that were both 15 lbs. Carving will commence in approximately 45 minutes. I stupidly wore my red Danskos. They are still covered in mud and rotten pumpkin. Mrs. Carroll let me wash my hands in the sink of the concession stand- the store is really cute and the farm has a ton of scarecrows with pumpkins for heads depicting various popular characters like Spiderman and Captain Jack Sparrow from Pirates of the Caribbean. It's like the Disneyland of pumpkin farms. We were really pleased with ourselves for making the effort to buy local until Anna freaked out on us at dinner. Danny Carroll is the Republican candidate running for State Representative. He's against stem cell research, same sex marriage, and freedom and we just contributed 20 pumpkin dollars towards his campaign. Damn. We don't regret our trip, however, because it was such an important mid-western experience. He's probably going to win though. People LOVE Danny Carroll around these parts.

While we were out, we stopped by Hyvee for tube rolls and brownies, our contribution to family dinner on our floor. Christena invited Ryan and me to dinner when we picked up the keys to her car. She LOVES to cook and sew and make art and watch movies. She's one of my favorite people on the floor. We had chicken and corn and mashed potatoes and rolls with Meredith's low sodium salt; Britt did the dishes. I'm bringing cooking supplies when I come back from winter break so I can be more domestic.

Ryan and I figured out our Halloween costumes. Initially, I thought it would be really awesome if I went as a sperm and he went as an egg. He wasn't into it. So last night at Goodwill, I decided that I would be a truck driver, inspired by this really awesome jacket I found on the costume rack. Then, Ryan found these really hideous purple short shorts. He's going to be my dead hooker!!! It's going to be sweet. We bought ropes and fake blood at Wal-Mart last night (we hit Carroll's Hate Farm and Wal-"We don't DO Unions"-Mart on the SAME night) and we're both going to wear the work boots we bought for NOLA.

Kathleen is getting a Little Sister from Grinnell. She passed the interview that the organization insisted be held in our room this afternoon. We did a bit of cleaning last night in preparation. My side was wholesome for approximately 14 hours.

This evening's itinerary:
1) Pumpkin carving
2) Dinner
3) Saw II (Ryan bought it last night at Big WM)
4) Saw III premier at the Strand Theatre downtown
5) Other things until 2 AM probably

Auntie Joanie! I got the package. It is incredible. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you!!! Needless to say, the candy is gone, the window clings are up, and half of the people on my floor think you're really rad because you sent what they believe to be "Vampire Porn" (the Hanson card has helped too.) I painted a pumpkin on my window with the markers and I hung up the glow-in-the-dark skeleton right away using a piece of yarn with a condom attached to the end of it from a dance party I went to at the beginning of the year called Red Light, Green Light. We will go to New Orleans together some day. I think we would have a really good time being obscene and obnoxious. I'm finally old enough to be a cool niece. YAY!

Sex Toy Raffle

2006-10-25T22:14:00.000-07:00

This is how I feel about spending my Thanksgiving at Grinnell with all the international students who can't make it home either. My cousins, Kavik and Kira will be taking my place this year at Thanksgiving in Bellingham.

I've been talking to Kavik and Kira online pretty regularly. Yes, I understand Kavik is an unusual name. I decided to post this message because I just remembered that they will be at my house, sleeping in my bed, and eating my turkey this Thanksgiving. Kavik is a freshman at Seattle University and Aunt Jane and Kira are flying from Pennsylvania to eat with my fam. I want to come home for Thanksgiving. Probably don't tell my parents. They can find out when they read this.

Professor Alfonso handed back our midterms plus another essay she's been grading for the last three weeks in class today. I did pretty well. I'm convinced, however, she didn't actually read the papers because as I was rereading my work, I came across whole sentences that made absolutely no sense. I know she can read because every class, she summarizes the readings from the night before for 50 minutes solid. Good news everyone, Alfonso resigned and she's getting the hell out of my life. I wrapped up Newspaper stuff pretty early tonight. David puts his iTunes on shuffle every week and it managed to catch every song by U2 twice. I made sure to add all the "Love Your Body Week" events in the News calendar, including the girls-only masturbation workshop being held in the lounge of my dorm at 8 P.M., Tuesday. They're raffling off sex toys. I'm beside myself.

Next semester, I'm switching meal plans. I really only eat 14 meals per week. I also want to take a sculpting class. I can't believe we register for classes in two weeks. Well, kind of I can.
I have a lot of crap on my bed right now. I think I'll just lay on top/around it when I go to sleep in 30 seconds.

A Collection of Photographs from NOLA

2006-10-24T10:00:00.000-07:00

Our accommodations at St. Luke's Episcopal Church: all 30 of us had a cot with a large foam pad to sleep on.

This house is a really typical one. It has structural damage and a "bath tub ring" at about 4 feet. The contents of this home had already been removed

The Lower Ninth Ward. This person had neighbors before the levee failed.

Jessica, Fai, Margie, and Neo in the Liplander during a rainstorm in the French Quarter. The "U" and the "P" in the Chevy Uplander looked like "LIP" at the right angle. Adam tried and failed to nickname the van "Rex."

This is the Jazz Band that played for us at the community meal. The trombone player on the end was especially passionate and I liked how the man with the clarinet wasn't wearing socks.

Fai, Erin, Anna, Rachel, and Margie at Joey T's on our last night. I had the Jambalaya.

We were not permitted to take pictures of the houses we gutted. The organization enforces this rule as a means to protect the anonymity of the homeowner.

Posted Tuesday, October 24, 2006

2006-10-18T15:34:00.000-07:00

I've been home for a few days now and I'm starting to remember my routine. I didn't expect the readjustment process to take so long. I miss NOLA and I miss singing and laughing with Neo, Erin, Evan, Fai, Jessica, Rachel, Ryan, Adam, and Anna. We all decided that we would remain friends when we returned to Grinnell- as we engage in half-ass conversations with people who can't even begin to understand what we saw, what we did, and who we met, it's been great to know there are nine others that are feeling just as out of place. Last night we had a Red Beans & Rice dinner with about 20 of the NOLA Alt Breakers. Kathleen thinks I'm obsessed with the stuff. Becca and Maggie's recipe was spicy and delicious and I burned everyone CDs of all the inappropriate songs we sang rolling in our white Chevy Impala. I bought a vanilla air freshener for the car at a gas station mid-week to mask the dead animal smell we tracked in from the refrigerators we pulled from the homes we gutted. When she returned it on Saturday morning, Rachel decided to leave it in to make up for all the water bottles, masks, and contaminated work gloves we left in the back seat. I loved that car. Holla.

We worked on four houses throughout the week, all of which were in different neighborhoods that sustained varying degrees of wind and water damage. Several of the homes we were assigned had already been touched by local volunteers (the homeowners of the homes that we gutted did not have the financial means to hire a professional crew. The cost of gutting is typcially $3,000-$4,000 depending on the size of the home.) The home we worked on on Monday was significantly less taxing than the homes we tackled the remainder of the week.

Tuesday we were assigned a duplex full of contents including a handful of storage containers filled to the brim with "Katrina Gumbo"- a combination of water from the storm, roaches, personal items, and sewage. The homeowners had yet to return to their property so we were especially concerned with preserving the photos and dishware we found buried under piles of crap and structural debris. The difference between the organization we worked under and a professional gutting company is that our primary concern is the homeowner. Professional teams don't get payed to sort through a stranger's belongings. We found two refrigerators in the duplex. Fortunately, they were both upright. I took one out with a hand truck; Ryan took the other. Thirty minutes later, scavengers with a large pick up truck came by and drove away with both of the units. According to our crew leaders, it's not uncommon for people to come by and sort through and repossess the items pulled from the homes of their neighbors. One can bring in $200-$300 worth of scrap metal on a good day of hunting. We returned to this home several times but we were never able to completely finish the process. Unfortunately, half of the duplex was deemed structurally unsound after the ceiling over the master bedroom buckled in a rainstorm.

We were sent to the home of a retired school teacher on Wednesday; her property is yards away from the "Mr. Go Levee" in the Lower Ninth Ward. When the water finally settled in September, 2005, it did so at just over eight feet. At this home, the fridge was not upright; the smell of an overturned fridge is was like nothing I've ever smelled before. Adam threw up in his mask last summer when the volunteer crew he worked with mistakedly opened the fridge door. 13 month old milk, cheese, meat, and eggs oozes out in green liquid form. When we entered, the ceilings were on the floor. Under the ceilings was a solid two feet of debris and contents mixed with cracked sheet rock and plaster. The work was hard and we were only permitted to stay until noon because our crew chief didn't trust the roof. Anna, who worked for two months last summer with the organization, said this home had some of the worst structural damage she had ever seen.

The remainder of our week was spent at Ms. Holmes house in the Lakewood neighborhood. Since April, she has lived in a FEMA trailer next to her home and for the last six months, she has been sifting through the debris in her house without a mask in search of salvageable items. In a day and a half, we were able to finish her home and during lunch on Friday, she told us her evacuation story over a roast beef Po Boy. Our garbage pile after just two days was 15 feet across, four feet high, and almost thirty feet long. Ms. Holmes plans to rebuild. We found termite damage and black mold in almost every room (plus an ungodly number of red cockroaches) but still, the neighborhood is all she has known of the city. We watched as Adam walked her through her home at the end of our final workday; she cried throughout the entire walk through. Ms. Holmes will begin another phase of reconstruction when she has the money to hire a contractor. She's been stuck in the same rut for over a year and we helped to pull her out.

The city looks like a war zone. There's not much more I can say about its physical state. It will take five to 10 years for the city to truly function again. Fifty percent of its residents have yet to return.

New Orleans is an incredible place, though. We visited the French Quarter several times- Cafe Du Monde/beignets twice- and listened to a mediocre talk about Displaced Populations at Tulane University. On Thursday night, we attended a community meal the Episcopal church prepares for its gutting volunteers. They bring in a jazz band every week to entertain patrons- this week's was pulled straight from Frenchman Street (we visited a few jazz clubs on Frenchman our first night in town.) After the dinner, we stopped in front of the Real World New Olrean's Mansion on St. Charles. Robbs hooked us up with the address. Ryan and I were beside ourselves. He basically wept as I took his picture in front of the Belfort. Bourbon Street was insane- so many middle aged white women and men doing incredibly embarrassing things. I saw one pair of breasts and two penises. One of the greatest parts of the trip for me was just driving around the city. Adam and Anna made sure we saw it all; the areas hit hardest and the ones barely touched physically by TFW (Initially, search teams were instructed to spray the acronym, which stands for Toxic Flood Water, on the sides of homes flooded with the most hazardous waste.)

I'm looking forward to returning next year, probably next summer. I would like to get a group of friends from home to come down with me. I can think of a handful that would be into it and then there's Kari who would be an excellent waterbottle filler.

On a lighter note: Spanish kicked my ass and Professor Purcell can't seem to get past my "grandiose prose." I still maintain that my diction and sentence structure make for a more interesting read. I have a five pager due tomorrow and a few papers due next week. I would also like a new winter vest. I think I'm going to order my Land's End winter gear this afternoon. It's only getting colder here. I bowled a 569 series last night. Two games I scored above 200. Lynn still calls me Margo because he says it saves him time. The pre-shot cheer is already included in the name- Mar(gie)-Go. He's belligerent.

Carroll's Pumpkin farm this week. WHAT AM I GOING TO BE FOR HALLOWEEEEEEEN?!

The Lakes Of Pontchartrain

2006-10-16T21:52:00.000-07:00

I survived all my finals. I wrote and revised a total of eight essays last week, I gave a gripping presentation on Robert Noyce and the Robert Noyce '25 Science Center, and I failed a Spanish test. I know what you're thinking and I'm almost positive I failed. Like, I hope I score in the two digits. Kathleen gave me some really sound advice the night before all of my stuff was due and I was lying in the hall ass up in obscure Spanish grammar: "It's not worth it; don't kill yourself for this." Then Noah came out and asked me if he could barrow my calculator. Of course I said yes because he's a cool dude. I jumped up off the ground, sprinted into my room, tore through the piles of crap on my desk, woke up Kathleen, found it, and ran back to the hall where I made the hand off. The Calc was out of AAA batteries. I'm pretty sure I haven't fired it up since May, 2006.

I'm in New Orleans now with finals behind me. Here's a really brief play by play of my life since Friday at 4:05 because the wireless is shaky and I'm on the porch in the rain in a sketchy neighborhood.

4:05 PM - Turn in my final paper for tutorial.
4:06- Receive a call from Kathleen- who has already left for Denver- asking me to unlock the door to our room because she forgot her towel and pillow.
4:07- Throw the keys up the fire escape. She catches them and leaves for Denver.
4:19- Run to Norris so Ryan can pick up his check to take to the bank.
4:20- Receive a second call from Kathleen. She needs her cell phone charger.
4:45- Visit Wells Fargo and Saints Rest. Wells Fargo is where all the Sub Frees bank.
5:05- Make a Wal-Mart run with Ryan, Carter, and Will.
6:00- Play Skip-Bo with the floor before dinner will Anna finishes a paper.
7:00- Go to Dinner. It was pretty good, I think.
8:00- Start laundry.
8:30- Ryan starts to pack.
9:00- Hang out with the flood- End of Mid Sems FIESTA. AYAYAYA…
1:00 AM- Finish laundry. Naked.
2:30- Shower.
3:00- Power nap.
3:30- Arrive at the wrong bus stop for the Alt Break Departure to NOLA.
3:45- Arrive at correct bus stop. Two very important parts of my body were frozen. They are on me chest.
4:18- Leave Grinnell. One girl is late AND forgets her ID so the bus driver drives twenty miles over the speed limit to make up for lost time. He sighs. I know because I was sitting in front.
5:35- Arrive in Cedar Rapids with plenty of time with “Wide Open Spaces” playing on the radio super loud.

And then a lot of other stuff happened. I snored for a good hour in the airport at Cedar Rapids before our 7:45 flight to Dallas. I think I was trying to sleep off the pain of having to surrender my brand new face wash, toothpaste, and Hemp Lotion from the Body Shop at security. All of the tubes of product that exceeded 3 OZ in volume I was forced to trash. When I asked the Woman Guard if she was “sure I had to leave the lotion,” she said “yeah, I’m sure” and then made a really obnoxious breathing-out noise under her breath. I slept the entire flight. We were so pressed for time in Dallas, we had to sprint up three flights of broken escalator. We made it to the top in exactly the same amount of time as the people who opted for the working escalator. We were big sweaty LOSERS.

The city of New Orleans hit me like a ton of bricks. While the water is gone, every road is covered in gnarly pot holes and homes are still tagged with spray paint from the crews that checked for bodies over thirteen months ago. Every block almost, a car is pulled over with a flat tire. The only thing “new” in New Orleans are the cars because everyone had to replace their vehicles after the storm. Today I saw a FEMA trailer with an Escalade parked right next to it. The distribution of wealth here is unbelievable. All the FEMA trailers are white. They’re issued to whole families for only a year. One block, the houses have two stories and are dressed for Halloween and on the next, they act like garbage cans, holding in crap and mud and debris from the storm. Many of the houses that we've seen from the street have not been touched since the homeowner evacuated. We’re staying in Orleans Parish at St. Luke’s Episcopal Church on 30 cots in the gym. The high school down the street from us is surrounded by police officers and every entrance has a metal detector. Apparently, every class has between 50 and 70 students because they can’t pay the teachers enough to come back and teach in such piss-poor conditions. We hit Bourbon St. our first night in town. To get to the French Quarter (which is incredible and full of life) we had to pass several full blocks of subsidized housing units. The projects are vacant now because the city can’t afford to get them back in order. I don’t know where the 1,000 or so families are now that once lived there. No one seems to know when the city will return to normal. Never, probably. Everything is abandoned and no one has money to rebuild.

The first house we gutted today was fairly easy but we’re only ¾ of the way done. The homeowners had already done a bit of work on the duplex. We met with them and they seemed to think they would be rebuilding within the next year. To gut a house, you have to remove all the contents i.e. refrigerators, photo albums, and left behind clothing then remove the walls including the molding and sheet rock. We ate our PB&J lunch next to Lake Pontchartrain- only a dream of mine since hearing the remix of “The Lakes Of Pontchartrain” by the Be Good Tanyas.

At the end of the day, we popped in the Mix CD our group compiled. I contributed “Jolene” by Dolly Parton. It seems to be growing on everyone. We had red beans and rice for dinner tonight- a Monday night tradition- with the other volunteers from the Episcopal Diocese. It was tasty.

I love it here and I know the city is important to many people but I don’t know if I would have come back to pick my life back up if I had lost my home, my family, and all of my personal belongings. It’s all so daunting. According to our leaders with the Diocese, homeowners are at the stage in the recovery process where they have many good days and only some bad days. I’ve had only good days so far but I’ve been trying to put myself in the place of the people who survived Hurricane Katrina. The houses must look and smell like they did this time last year when all the water started to drain but kids are going to school and new businesses are opening everyday.

I’d like to come back here with my parents and my friends. Only at different times.

No. Sleep. Til NOLA.

2006-10-09T12:42:00.000-07:00

Professor Fisher hates freedom.

That's why she assigned four essays for our mid-semester take home final. The best part of the test was the "What's the worst thing you can call a man/woman?" brainstorm. A good time was had by all at the impromptu all-hall brainstorming session. Today in class, Ashley from sub free told us that her friends came up with much "nicer" names. Pssh. Those sub free kids are a HOOT.

I finished what I could of the test at 3:30 this morning then picked it back up again at 6:45. Three hours does not constitute a night of sleep. Three hours is a nap on a Saturday afternoon. I apologize, Kathleen, for keeping you up. Glow of the lap top/frantic typing noise v. Snoring. Hmmmmmmm...

Tonight is my last ReNew Orleans Alternative Break meeting before TAKE OFF. We'll discuss travel plans and go over the week's itinerary. I'll be late and I'm considering not telling anyone and just running in, tears streaming down my face. Bowling is every Monday. I SWEAR I marked off the 7-10 PM time slot when we were scheduling meeting times. I really REALLY need to study. I power napped for 15 minutes in the Fireplace Room before Spanish today. When I arrived in class, I remembered that all of my work was exactly half finished. Ben talked a lot nothing and with many grammatical errors. He's going to get really high marks in participation, though. This irritates me. Instead of participating, I started my Christmas list and brainstromed things I want to do with people I like back in B*Town. IKEA was number one. Coffee and bagel on Rail Road, number two. And eating chips at boulevard Park number three.

I have a two hour long monitor shift in the SRC library today. Last week, when I informed Lester that no one showed up to relieve me at 5:30, I stupidly volunteered to take the second hour. Ryan and I are going to picnic in the library because I have to leave for bowling at 6:30. I'm seriously considering not doing any work until tomorrow and peacing out before midnight this evening.

Professor Alfonso also hates freedom. She assigned 10 essays, five of which will appear on an in class exam. Of the five, we're required to select three "to essay." She wants five paragraphs for each piece. When the assignment first dropped, Jess Cheney tried her best to convince Alfonso that it is almost physically impossible to write 15 coherent paragraphs in a 50 minute class period. She didn't care. We were given the prompts ahead of time for a reason. I'm writing eight and submitting the three strongest that appear on the final cut. By weeks end, I will have written 13 essays, completed an oral presentation on a local monument, and passed(?) a Spanish exam.

Holy crap.

I leave for New Orleans at 3:30 AM this Saturday. In less than 110 hours, I'll be snoring on a plane feeling really good about leaving Grinnell, Iowa behind for a week.

Thomas, the name of a killer

2006-10-07T10:05:00.000-07:00

So the Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning was "bull shit" just like my Dad promised it would be. I probably didn't need to "see that piece of shit" (also Dad) but I did and I will never again. Nor will I go to Texas or eat meat or say anything remotely insensitive of someone who has a mental disability who wields a chainsaw because we all know what happened to the last 34 people who couldn't keep their mouths shut.

Here is a brief synopsis. It's 1939 and America has reached the bitter end of the Great Depression. The only industry in a barely-there town in Texas is the meat packing plant. The movie opens with a woman meat packer on the job and pregnant, writhing with labor pains. The boss refuses to let her take a break as her water breaks and she collapses to the floor. She passes out in a massive pile of blood and amniotic fluid as the boss rushes to her side. She dies but the mutant-baby pushes himself free. The boss tosses the baby in the dumpster and a woman eating tossed-aside scraps of meat finds him and takes him home in a piece of meat-packing paper. They call him Thomas and over the course of the opening credits, the audience sees his adopted father "operating" on Thomas' deformed face and Thomas killing animals and making their raw skin into masks. Thirty years later, Thomas' father gets word from the town's last remaining sheriff that the meat packing plant where his son is employed (the same plant where he was born) is closed indefinitely by the health department and that Thomas, in a rage, had massacred the boss in protest. Thomas's father and the sheriff find Thomas on the road, chainsaw in hand. The sheriff hops out of the car and attempts to coax him in to the back. Thomas's father, in defense of his son and his town, grabs the rifle on the sheriff's dash and shoots him point blank in the face. Thomas's father puts on the sheriff's uniform, asks his son to chop up the sheriff, and the family eats him in a bloody stew. Thomas's father is the law now and he insists on being called Sheriff Hoyt.

Meanwhile, two twenty-something couples embark on a road trip to an army base camp from which the two men will be deployed to Vietnam. A run in with a rather large Holstein rolls their jeep during a chase with a rifle wielding motorcycle wench. When "Sheriff Hoyt" enters the scene to inspect the situation, he kills the motorcycle wench, ties up the co-eds in the back of his car, and tortures them at his mansion for a solid 45 minutes of movie. One girl, thrown from the accident, watches the scene from a bush but winds up at the mansion and under the table where her boyfriend is chainsawed. Thomas also rips off his face and wears it as his own. Then, they eat him. During the last three minutes, the last girl alive, determined to avenge the deaths of her friends, winds up at the meat packing plant and escapes in the boss's car. The proper authority in sight, she is sure she's in the clear UNTIL, Thomas pops up in the backseat and runs his chainsaw through the driver's side seat and through her abdomen. It was sick. I knew it was coming. And I screamed bloody murder. The End.

Christian is singing to a symphony orchestra track right now. He has amazing projection.

Uninspired

2006-10-06T12:46:00.000-07:00

This week kicked my ass.

You should check out the October 6 issue of the S&B at http://www.grinnell.edu/sandb/index.html. I placed the ads, layed out three pages (the KDIC Radio Schedule and the Double Truck for the JRo Dedication,) I finished two calendars, one movie time box, and a volleyball feature that didn't run. Neo was an hour late for the volleyball interview. None of the pictures were ready for the double truck on Wednesday so I had to spend all day Thursday in the Pubs Room. I couldn't place the Choung Garden ad. They're going to be furious. No room. Sorry, man.

In addition to the S&B stuff, I had a paper due yesterday and a Spanish composition due today. It was the kind of paper that makes you physically ill when I thought about just how unpleasent it's going to be to write. Two of my classes were cancelled this week so I managed to get a solid nine hours of sleep last night. The night before, I crawled in bed at 3:45, woke up (kind of) for the fire alarm at 4:30, woke up to finish a paper at 9:00 and sprinted to the Pubs room at 11:30.

I took an incredible 35 minute power nap in the new Fireplace Room in the JRo yesterday. The Grinnell Singers who were practicing on the second story woke me up with a choral arrangement of the fight song. Think of your worst nightmare, then set it to music with really bad choreography. That's what it was like. The alumni and trustees are visiting this weekend. Today at lunch, this really old woman (class of 1878, probably) with processed white hair sat down at the table next to me. She had a massive corn flake stuck in a curl on top of her head. I didn't have the heart to tell her.

In spite of it all, I managed to shower everyday this week. Tuesday night, though, my toothpaste went missing and I couldn't buy another tube until yesterday afternoon. I would say Thursday morning was one of the lowest points of my semi-adult life. I also got a text from Caitlin saying CatTed had to go to the ER on Wednesday night for an intestinal malfunction of some kind. I talked to CatTed last night after calling St. Joe's to make sure she wasn't admitted. She was doing a lot better.

I MISSED PROJECT RUNWAY. Damn. My first episode of the entire season...

Tonight, the dining hall is only open from 4:30 to 6. Some of us are going to Casa Margarita instead, then to the Strand to see Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning. I will probably piss my pants with fear. Tomorrow night, I'm going to Multi Culti house for a visit. They're a fun bunch. I just remembered I have a take home Sociology exam due on Monday at 8:30. I'm going to go take a nap until bowling class now so I can forget again.

I talked to Kelly, Rachel, and Robbs yesterday online. They must think I'm depressed. I'm not. I swear. But the DVD I borrowed from Molly is missing right now. That's annoying. I may have to go buy another copy and just keep the lost copy when I recover it.

For Rachel: "Da, da weekend, da da da weekend" -Kid Sensation, '91. Live it up, guuuuurl.

Birthday Photo Essay

2006-10-04T10:54:00.000-07:00

This is the birthday cake from the Episcopalians. In this picture, the cake is still frozen. Christena (behind Ryan,) Ryan (in the hat,) Carter, and I are lighting the candles on the outside first. The quoteboard in the background has a really awesome picture of the female reproductive system. I like this picture because you can really see how dire the haircut situation is.

Christena, Ryan, and I are finishing up the cake. All the Happy Birthday confetti is everywhere and the Aloha Fiesta party napkins are only half gone. This is just six days before Christena was diagnosed with Mono. She went home to Kansas today to recover.

This is me eating the last piece of cake with out hands. The Minute Made orange juice is contaminated with Mono- so is that elbow.

Thanks, Kathleen!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! for the pictures.

What your laundry says about you

2006-10-03T18:46:00.000-07:00

I think you have to be Italian to run the espresso machine at the Grille because today, all the espresso beans from the top feeder shot out on to the counter and floor. All the beans on the counter I put back in the machine. All the ones on the floor I managed to step on so they were especially hard to sweep up. New Girl helped me pick them up. Jon, a vegetarian and the Out Takes (bag lunch, to-go) distributor, fetched the broom. Zyme sat around and looked stupid, as per his usual.

My birthday shoes came today!

I love them.

Last night, I bowled the highest game in the house (243) and won the pot on the lane. I'm ahead three dollars. Troy and I both had strong first games (which he attributed to "getting some" last weekend when he visited his girlfriend in Minneapolis) but then bowled pretty poorly on the second and the third. Adam and Anna cancelled the ReNew Orleans meeting and the Red Beans and Rice Dinner that was scheduled for Monday because we all needed a little break. The floor celebrated my birthday again with cake and root beer floats.

I did four loads of laundry last night and had to dry the two loads I put in the dryer twice because they were so dense. A guy from my GWS class was in the laundry room when I headed down to check on round one in the dryer. He was in the process of removing all of my clothes so he could dry his own. My jeans and sweatshirts had been sitting there for 15 minutes tops AND they were still wet. What a tool. I made sure to pay it forward and took some other girl's thongs and workout clothes out of another machine. Based on her laundry, I imagine this girl is probably a huge slut.

My Wednesday AND Thursday 8:30 classes are cancelled- Professor Fisher has to say goodbye to her son in Colorado who leaves for his second tour in Iraq on Friday- so a few of us are going to watch a movie tonight. This weekend, the campus is celebrating 10/10, Payday!!! Depending on who is reading this, I may or may not be participating in the all-campus activities to, as the shirts say, "Fight Sobriety."

All of my professors sign off in emails with "Cheers."

Sick.

2006-10-02T12:26:00.000-07:00

From: Christian Conkle [mail to:conklech@grinnell.edu]
Sent: Saturday, September 30, 2006 3:01 AM
To: Brumer, Adam N
Cc: Hinds-Brush, Kimberly
Subject: Loose 2nd bathroom disaster

Somebody has been having serious difficulty with the operation of the toilet. After finding and flushing down some "loose stool" this afternoon, I just found the toilet in 6226H completely full of crap and paper--which clogged the toilet quite dramatically. With Nilesh's help, I managed to get it unclogged and the floor somewhat cleaned up, but that restroom is currently in a very unsanitary state. I also can't think of a way to dispose of the filthy mop water without soiling a sink, so it's sitting outside the custodial closet. This needs to not happen again.

-C

In case you're wondering, this wasn't my fault. I swear to god. Christian lives two doors down from me. He's awake at all hours and listens to classical music because he believes the composers are truly his friends. This is the single greatest email I have EVER read. I managed to read the copy taped to Karen's Custodial Closet and because I found it so amusing, I asked Adam to forward it to me.

Ryan and I made Carter take us to Wal Mart at 12:30 this morning. We bought Pot Pies and toquitos and returned to Loose for a 2 AM study session. Sociology was annoying this morning. I hate everyone in the class except Liza (because she's silent,) Julia (because her attendance is sporadic,) Song (because he's a fourth year Bio Chem major getting in some last minute humanity credits,) Amy, and Ryan. I wish the rest would drop the class. I especially wish Professor Fisher would drop the class. She's a real problem.

I have my first monitor shift in the Stonewall Recourse Center Library this afternoon. I'm hoping to get a bit of work done because I hear there is very little foot traffic in the corner room of the third floor of the JRo. I think I'm going to buy a Snapple before my session starts.
My big box of winter clothes arrived this morning. Meredith from my floor brought it out to me (she says I can be the Post Office Bitch when she and Anna graduate this spring) and Meredith from Loose Third opened all the doors for me on my way home. Apparently she made a similar trek last week with 30 lbs of snow cone syrup.

I have a cold. Christena from across the hall has mono. She's been watching movies in the dark for three days and eating nothing but mild-butter popcorn. Last week, I shared a Snapple with her at Newspaper Paste-Up. Things could get ugly.

Inspired by my phone and study sessions in the bath tub of the co-ed bathroom, I'm going to turn the tub into a couch with pillows and a sheet from Second Time Around. According to Amelia, the only thing the tubs are ever used for is dying hair and making Jungle Juice. I will not be converting 6226H into any sort of oasis. They should be bringing in chemicals on Wednesday.

I woke up this morning at 3:45 with poor Kathleen standing over me. I look at the clock, look up at her and the only thing she says is "You've got to stop snoring." I apologize and she says "We'll talk about it in the morning."

Oh my god. She must have finally snapped.

I'm sorry, Kathleen...

Here she is... our Mount Rose American Teen Princess...

2006-10-01T12:26:00.000-07:00

Last night was decent.

Brent, Carter's best friend from home, came to visit for the weekend. We showed him a decent time. Told decent tales and ate decent food from the Grille at 2 AM this morning. Instead of calling him by his actual name, I decided right away that he looked more like a "Bruno." Unfortunately for him, the nickname stuck. aThank You. He left this morning at about 3- he got a little somethin' somethin' from some international students at Harris, so he was pretty well satisfied with his trip, I think.

I woke up for lunch today and met Ryan at the JRo for grilled cheese and fruit of the forest pie. Meghan kicked us out at 1:50. She's really intimidating. I would like to see her and Stephanie Eggink box. It would be a good fight. To the death.

I have to shower and watch a documentary for GWS in 33 minutes. Professor Alfonso reserved the AV Center for a group of us. This one's about Miss America. I'm excited because I really, REALLY love beauty pageants. The only thing better than watching a beauty pageant on television is watching your friend Caitlin Williams perform in one at the community college. In loving memory I offer this, the all-time greatest post crowning/psuedo make-out shot from the 2006 Miss Whatcom County Pageant.

Awesome, huh?

I talked to Kathryn Frazier yesterday. She's liking Western. I need to call Caitlin. Caitlin, if you're reading this, Ima call you.

From the perspective of an addict

2006-09-30T14:29:00.000-07:00

Jordan Creek is like the Mall of America only with less stores and better dressed locals. It took about two hours worth of really bad Mexican ska to find the mall (in West Des Moines) because Danny had to make a special trip to a camera repair shop to fix his lens. Apparently, Ritz Camera Repair has been out of business for three years. I had to ask directions from three different people along the way because Ryan and Danny were too male to do it themselves. Typical. I've been lost on the road for three years. Asking directions of complete strangers multiple times is like second nature. We managed to meet a semi-professional country western singer, I think, at the Holiday Inn where we stopped. WORTH IT.

I bought some hemp lotion from the Body Shop and ate Chinese in the food court. We hit Abercrombie, Buckle, Hollister, Express Men, Aeropostle, Gap, and AE harder than I ever have before.

When we got back to campus, everyone was already "Loose and Ready" so we had some catching up to do before the event. Loose was only "off the chain" for about 45 minutes (we were there just long enough to see the Spanish Language Assistant we are completely infatuated with) so we decided to catch the last five minutes of the "Hockey Night" concert in Main.

We called it a night relatively early. I walked Ryan back to Norris and took a campus bike back to the dorm. It was really thrilling and dangerous. This morning we caught lunch at Noon30 and peaced out to the Water Polo Match. Bobbi didn't get any playing time but he should be in the water tomorrow. The signs for the tournament promised exposed genetalia and blood. There was none of that but Grinnell took the win. Back in Ryan's dorm, he made us coffee for our NEW and FREE Joe Rosenfield '25 Center memorial mugs. We chatted with Jess and Carolyn for awhile before Jess left for Wal-Mart. I gave her 50 cents and told her bring back the most offensive Homie she could. I expect her to deliver.

Tonight we're going to watch a Docu/Film about street kids in Seattle for a Soc project. It will be nice to see the city... from the perspective of an addict.

Everyone call me all the time please. I like to talk and listen to voice mails.

My Birthday

2006-09-28T14:30:00.000-07:00

First birthday at Grinnell = the weirdest birthday of my life. I mean, it was good. I didn't get to sleep nearly enough, I really only had three pieces of cake, I couldn’t spend time with any of my friends from Bellingham, and the people that wished me happy birthday did so because of the new and especially invasive Facebook feature BUT my parents sent me a delicious cake baked by the Episcopalians. Apparently, a really senior member of the congregation dropped it off when I wasn't around. Kathleen put it in the fridge for me and took pictures of the small gathering we had on Loose Second. Thanks, Roomie! Naturally, I blew out all 19 candles on the cake on the first try. Since Will’s a boy scout, he thinks he’s flame retardant. Everyone knows you light from the inside out. No accidents to report, but we had several close calls. Will's a far humbler man.

After cake with the floor, a few of us headed to the pit to watch Pee Wee's Playhouse on Adult Swim. It was really trippy. Kathleen, who has never seen the show, was especially troubled. The Long's used to love Pee Wee. I remember they had a beach towel with his face on it that I would use after bathing with Con Man and Maggs. When I had chickedn pox, they let me borrow a film from their extensive collection of Pee Wee movies.

I went to bed at 2 AM. I haven't been to bed before 2 AM for a week.

My mom also packed and sent this incredible party suitcase. I hoarded most of it. This weekend, we'll find a use for the tiki straws, I’m sure. I picked up another sweet care package from Uncle Jack, Starbucks Baristo this AM. I will probably grind the fair trade blend in the grinder he sent very late at night. Janet also packed a really amazing box of little things, all individually wrapped. The MacSlarrows also out did themselves with the vintage Linda Allen shirt they sent. I put it on over my shirt right in the post office and walked to Spanish singing "Without All the Women" and "Spirit Dreamer" under my breath. It was very weird and meaningful. Spiritually. Rachel HATES the song "Spirit Dreamer" because it's about a girl that is perpetually molested by her father until adulthood. I think it has a nice melody.

Ariel led the dining hall in a happy birthday sing-a-long for me too not once but twice. Rachel called me four times and sent a link to the Beatles "They Say It's Your Birthday" over AIM. I was away from the phone every time and now I think she's at the Paul Simon concert with Lisa Dell so I can't get a hold of her. Today I got a really awesome card made out of notebook paper from Lina. Bobbi Gas is coming to Grinnell this weekend for the Intramural Water Polo Tourney- I’m really hoping we can hit Choung Gardens to celebrate. I maintain it's the first quality Chinese restaurant west of the Mississippi.

Ryan and I are trying to get Carter to take us to Wal-Mart today after the farmer's market. I really need some lotion- winter is moving in and my hands and feet are getting pretty nasty. A few stands sell homemade moisturizing products. I’d actually like to buy some home-ground flour from the Mennonite family with the burgundy van. Danny from across the hall in Norris has agreed to drive us to Des Moines tomorrow in preparation for Loose and Ready- an infamous dance bash held in the lounge of my residence hall. It should be really obscene. I'll be there all night.

Monday night, when Ryan and I were in the library obsessing over Mother Iowa for a paper, a security guard walked through with a picture in one hand and a radio in the other. The next morning, we found out that campus security was looking for a missing student (a person must be missing 24 hours before a missing persons report may be filed.) Paul left a note on his roommate's desk asking him to give his guitar to a certain friend. He walked out late Sunday night and never came back. Helicopters, dogs, horses, dive teams, and 400 students and faculty have been searching the area for any trace of him but at this point they expect only to find his body. It's been very hard on campus because the community is so small. I can't imagine being the volunteer that finds their classmate in a "wooded area" off campus the teams continue to comb. CNN has covered the story and news teams are camped out at the volunteer check-in station outside of campus security. No one is releasing any additional information. It's all very surreal.

I hope things turn out better then they are expected to. Someone somewhere is thinking of a next step. I can't imagine what it will be.

From the State Capital of Iowa

2006-09-25T22:27:00.000-07:00

This is Mother Iowa.

I saw her on Saturday at the Iowa State Capital in Des Moines where Thomas Bateman, Ryan, and I took some compromising pictures from atop her bronze frame for Facebook. It was a really good trip. In the city, bought a coffee from Starbucks for the first time in six weeks and ate really good bread with balsamic vinegar and olive oil.

I'm quite behind on the blog because I've been working for three days on papers, readings, and other miscellaneous college fare. I almost quit college today, in fact. I packed up three shirts into the laundry duffel from the Macs and walked down the fire escape. Then I went to the laundry room. Doing laundry is like running away.

I'm in the library with Ryan right now trying to analyze this woman and her iconic integrity as one monument in a larger Civil War commemoration. It's going poorly. I will probably be up until class starts tomorrow and I won't be able to shower or brush my teeth.

Ojahla means "God willing" in Spanish.

Ojahla my birthday will be good. Today's my birthday. Today SUCKS right now.

Big time kudos to Ryan for supplying me with this breathtaking picture. I think he really captured her.

The Basket Case

2006-09-22T12:55:00.000-07:00

The first "Mean Girls Thursday" of the year was last night. Every Thursday from now until the end of the semester, Nick, Will, Carter, Kathleen, Ryan, Dan, and I will watch the movie together in Loose pit. The movie will begin promptly at 11:15 (enough time for the boys to return home from All Boys Cinema, ABC) and we will have refreshments and Halloween candy. I think that everyone in the whole world likes Mean Girls except Rachel and probably CatTed. I'm confident we'll only make it a week or so. Burling Library has over 4,000 feature films for checkout. It's like Tuesday at Crazy Mike's everyday of the year, MINUS the .99 cent rental fee.

We also hit Goodwill before dinner in preparation for the first 80's themed Harris Party of the year. Ryan is pretty serious about his costume. Inspired by the Breakfast Club, which we watched until the wee hours on Tuesday, I will portray the "Basket Case." I picked up several pieces for my ensemble as well as a 'Grinnell Girl Scouts' shirt. While the Girl Scout shirt I will wash in hot water before touching it to my bear skin, I'm really excited about it. Ryan is wearing a navy blue polo, khaki shorts, and white deck shoes (sans socks) that we had to pick up at Wal Mart. I bought a Homie on my last visit, as well. He was holding an assault rifle and his background was a small American Flag. It was the most offensive Homie I have ever vended. Carter found some black jeans and Will plans on wearing something from his own wardrobe. He usual dresses like a member of Pearl Jam.

I also bought 'Paint Your Own Kitty Bank' for $2. We'll paint it during dinner tonight. Should be real special. Since it's made by Roseart, the paint should be non toxic. Roseart designs kits for kids who struggle to keep their lips off of the paint brush.

Until the house party scene, I had forgotten Peaches was featured in Mean Girls. I am now burning discs for everyone. I call them "A Taste of Peaches."

Professor Valentin freaked out on us today I knew right away we were going to get it because she really sped up her Spanish. I would do that all the time if I had any sort of grasp on another language. I would give people a hard time all the time. Jon says he knows what she's saying when she's fuming because he went to Argentina last summer, but there's no possible way... He also thought he should be exempt from doing the Eva Peron assignment because he went to her Museum. I told him since he was not the curator of the museum, he would have to read the article and respond accordingly.

Last night before "Mean Girls Thursday," Ryan and I attended our second ReNew Orleans information session. We have to fundraise $4000 dollars in three weeks in order for all 30 of us to get down there. Rusty K (Russell K. Osgood, Grinnell College President who earns $600,000 a year) is our last resort. As a fundraiser, we're throwing a Red Beans and Rice community meal. I'll be cooking before league. If any of you are in the greater Grinnell area between 6 and 8 PM on Monday night, be sure to come hungry. Adam, Ryan, and I postered the academic buildings last night. Adam found a campus bike (the school as a fleet of yellow bikes that remain unlocked for students to use) so he rode around while we followed on foot with the flyers. He took it up and down the elevator in ARH several times. We got really terriblelooks from the ASIA Film Festival participants but Adam insisted it was a matter of self-governance and since he wasn't hurting anyone, he was well within his rights.

I postered the men's restrooms. Ryan wasn't ready to flyer the women's room so I had to do that too. I told him that we'll have to build to that.

Tomorrow is my field trip to Des Moines with my Tutorial class. We'll be looking at naked memorial statues cast in bronze and shopping. Unfortunately, we have a paper due on Tuesday based on our observations from the trip. Professor Purcell emailed us a link to the restaurant we'll be eating at in "the city." Pizza and assorted Italian food. I've eaten more pizza and Italian food in the dining hall since I've arrived than I have ever before in my entire life. I'm ording a sandwich or something... maybe a salad? It's on Grinnell, however, so whatever I order will probably be a large something with extra something else.

http://www.centrodesmoines.com/about_us/about_us.php. It's called Centros. Seems real hip.

P.S. Bravo aired a rerun of Runway last week. Randy, Brian, and I compare notes after each episode. I was really thankful things worked out the way they did.

Room 6230

2006-09-21T09:21:00.000-07:00

This is Kathleen and her roommate, Margie

Soap Yer Boots

2006-09-21T08:44:00.000-07:00

I just picked up the laundry I started last night at 5. It's been sitting down there for 17 hours. I had to re-dry a towel load at 2:30 this morning when I got in from Newspaper paste up. Annoying as hell. I was surprised none of my clothes were in the "Second Time Around" box. "Second Time Around" is a local thrift shop and the second Monday of every month, Karen takes a load down town. This month in the box: a massive load of white underwear and a floral comforter.

Listerine is not a substitute for an actual toothbrush and toothpaste. With that said, I keep a bottle in my bag now so I can take care of business on the way to class in the morning. Sometimes I spit on the train tracks.

Do not, I repeat DO NOT text, email, call, or carrier pigeon me about the outcome of the last episode of Project Runway. I missed it and I'm not very happy with myself.

I had my first ReNew Orleans orientation meeting last night. The group is going to be really good. However, one girl in my delegation is a member of the volleyball team. Her name is Neo and I think she's on to me. Adam and Anna, our leaders, have a lot of experience and promised to show us everything one is supposed to see in NOLA i.e. like drunk co-eds on Bourbon St. We're flying down (Missouri and Arkansas another time, perhaps?) and we'll be staying in a house on cots for a week. I need boots and a soap dish. I'm also in charge of putting together the group Playlist.

Professor Purcell emailed me last night. We're meeting this afternoon to discuss my Spanish test. It should be really awesome.

Don't forget to check out the calendar in this weeks edition of the Scarlet & Black. It has every volleyball game the team will play this week. Also, there's a really interesting Asian Film Festival happening next week.

DocuMeant to be a filmmaker

2006-09-19T15:23:00.000-07:00

Alfredo today. I dipped the "Tater Bucks" in my extra sauce (word to Ryan for spicing up your traditional "Tater Tot.") They were heavenly. I should also mention that today is "Talk like a Pirate Day." A handful of people on campus took it very seriously including the girl with the ripped shirt at the snack bar, Leah from my tutorial, and the international student who was probably tricked by someone into wearing pantaloons.

Kathleen has watched approximately half of the second season of "Grey's Anatomy" in preparation for Thurday's premier. I should probably start watching it with her so we have something to talk about. Also, I make her go to Project Runway every week... She totally digs it, though.

I'm going to Celebrity Bingo at Bob's Underground tonight. Last week, Russell K. Osgood, the President of Grinnell was the guest caller. I believe they secured the head of the science department for tonight's game. Every time I go to Bob's, I order a coffee drink not on the menu to make myself look a lot cooler. "Cafe Rolo, please." (Holllla to CatTed and my people at Avaleno's in BTown.) Then they look at me like I'm a huge snob. I did it to the nun turned Art intern working last weekend.

I have a bunch of reading to do tonight. I also get to watch the Alix Olsen movie for a GWS paper due this Monday again on Thursday. I wish I could watch documentaries all the time. Maybe I'll direct and produce them.

I'm going to be a documentary filmmaker when I grow up. My first film will probably be about adult shops.

Shout out to my people in Norris for an incredible Saturday night. I really can't stress it enough.

Heeeeeeeey Macarena...

World Peace

2006-09-18T22:39:00.000-07:00

I bowled a 575 tonight.

They're putting my name on the high score board under the owner's wife. We're the only two ladies in Grinnell that have qualified this season. We kick ass.

My "grossly inaccurate" volleyball article is going to haunt me for the rest of my life. Courtney graduates in three years, so my senior year, I won't have to worry about seeing her HATE me for printing that she was on academic probation. The coach hate-emailed me today. Maybe he'll retire? He's pretty old and not very successful as a coach.

The LMNOP movie tonight was also very bad.

I didn't fail my Spanish test, so I suppose it could have gone worse?

Nothing tasted good in the dining hall at lunch OR dinner. The problem is, they serve the same food at both meals. Maybe tomorrow they'll have alfredo. I can at least keep that down. I have 100 pages to read by 8:30 AM and I have to work from 1-5. I'm not going to read most of the pages but I'll go to work.

I really need to do laundry. I've been spraying Fabreeze like a chain smoker with cats. Laaaaaaaaaaame. It costs .90 cents for every load. If there was a river, hell, water of any kind in Grinnell, I'd just wash my clothes by hand in it. This would make me a true Grinnell Pioneer. Our mascot is the Pioneer. I've never been to a football, volleyball, or soccer game, so I wonder how they pulled off the costume.

Today was really good, actually. I should have written a more positive blog.

Tomorrow will probably be terrible.

I'm looking forward to it.

P.S. I had an incredible weekend. The highlight was watching the Spanish language assistant and the French language assistant get drunk off of cheap sangria.

NOLA

2006-09-17T20:13:00.000-07:00

I just received THIS email from Adam and Anna about Alternative Break...

Dear Jessica, Erin, Neo, Rachel, Evan, Ryan, Wasimon and Margie:

Thank you very much for taking the time to apply for AltBrk. As you know we had many applicants for the New Orleans trip. This meant that we had to be very selective and careful as to who we thought would be the best teammates.

You should know, however, that we are extremely excited to inform you that you will be joining us in New Orleans this Fall Break! You all really expressed great interest in learning about and helping New Orleans as well as wanting to be part of a close-knit, hardworking team.

We will be having our first meeting this week and ask that you please email us with the times that work best for you by the end of this evening. Anna and I will then look at the times and try and pick the most convenient for everyone. As a reminder, meetings are mandatory.

Thanks again for your applications and we are sooooooooooooooooooooo looking forward to working with you!

Much love,
Anna and Adam

ps. now go stalkernet each other (Adam wrote this part).

I'm going to New Orleans and I'm Funkapumped. We'll be driving down together. "Dear Missouri and Arkansas, I've never seen you before! Can't wait! Love, Margie"

I got the email right after Ben, the editor of the Scarlet & Black told me I had printed some false information about a Volleyball athlete in the story. Turns out Courtney Smith is on the Dean's List and was not on academic probation like I thought. Oops.

Kathleen was selected to go to Denver for a Peace Talks service project. We're both very content right now. The color of this font reminds me of Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream. Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream sandwiched between two halves of a waffle is incredible and something I try to eat in the dining hall twice if not six times every week.

Ode to the Shoe

2006-09-16T17:14:00.000-07:00

This is Jordan. He should be here, in my place. He knows why.

This picture was taken on my last visit to the Horseshoe before I left town. We ordered the cheese fries with a side of ranch and naturally smothered them in katchup.

I would like to go to the Horseshoe tonight before the Funkadesi concert.

I watched the band walk across Mac Field tonight during dinner. It was really awesome. They served spaetzle again sans kielbasa.

I am FunkaPUMPED. I've said this three times in the last hour and Kathleen looks as though she's going to FunkaME UP.

Funka-EXCITED.

2006-09-16T11:47:00.000-07:00

FUNKADESI IS IN TOWN and will be performing for us tonight at Harris Concert Hall as a benefit for Hurricane Katrina. I submitted my Alternative Fall Break application. One of the questions was if you could be any kitchen utensil, what would you be? I chose a butter knife (Rachel, holla!) because it's sole purpose is spreading butter. Butter=Love. The world needs more butter.

This is Funkadesi. If I could join any band in the world, I would choose to be in Peaches' entourage. Next, I would choose Funkadesi.

I would like to get to know the sitar player on a more personal level.

I've been listening to some clips of songs from their website. http://www.funkadesi.com/. I'm going bring a pillow to sit on tonight. When Dar Williams was in town, we sat on the floor for four hours. I basically had to roll back to Ellen's room. Not tonight. No ma'am.

Yes. Funkadesi starts in seven hours. Rachel and CatTed and Cait, I wish you were here because you would really appreciate this opportunity. Kelly and Kari, you would pretend like you were excited. Which is cool too.

I Think Trans Women are GREAT!!!

2006-09-15T14:33:00.000-07:00

In case you were wondering, I have infinite female power ballads on my iTunes and an incredible battery on the Dell. I've been in the basement for three days eating scraps of food that the third years throw down from ground level. I finished the volleyball story, I just took a ridiculously hard Spanish test, and I turned in a three page paper this afternoon for my tutorial class. This was undoubtedly the hardest week of college I've EVER HAD. If I was a moron and really rich, I would have dropped out this morning at 1 AM when I was still in the library trying to get a grip.

I didn't read my Women's Studies text last night. 50 pages from the Tong about radical feminism is probably the most effective sleep aid anyone can prescribe. Today, Professor Alfonso referenced the Michigan's Womyn's Festival and suggested all the biological womyn in the room van up to the festival this spring. I'm into it. One policy that the Festival has, however, is the M to F trans women are not allowed in, so a "Trans Camp" is pitched on the outskirts of the Festival and everyone goes over at night to get drunk.

Quote of the Day from Professor Alfonso:
"I think trans women are GREAT!!!"

A squirrel just hoped onto the loggia. It's hissing and freaking out. If it bites me, I'm prepared to kill it and take it into the lab to be tested for rabies.

This weekend is family weekend and all last night as I was writing my 9/11 media critique, parents kept walking past asking stupid questions about the library. Our fault for sitting near the East Asian Literature collection. Dan's fam is in town from New Jersey. Last night, Will and Carter promptly removed the "How to Put on a Condom" brochure I tacked up last week in preparation for their arrival. As college students, don't you think we should know how to put a condom on at this point? The pamphlet about male self-inspection is probably the most useful. It has a baseball catcher in full gear on the front with his glove over his cup. It's probably the most informative. Dan invited Kathleen to dinner. I think Ryan and I are going out for Chinese tonight. The China Sea, according to Adam, gives people perma diarrhea so we'll probably eat at the other one in town.

Right now, I'm trying to finish my application for Alternative Fall Break on the roof. I'm hoping to get into one of the ReNew Orleans trips. Campus is pretty dead right now. I'm singing The Be Good Tanya's "Littlest Birds Sing the Prettiest Songs" in honor of Robb's Birthday.

I'm not kidding. The cross country team just ran by naked again.

Shoot. I forgot to check my mail today.

I got a letter from Grandma yesterday on what I thought was the most patriotic stationary in the world. Everyone at dinner last night, however, decided that since it was eagle and glitter free and made no reference to god or god blessing something, there had to be something more patriotic out there, I just hadn't seen it yet.

I hear sirens. I think it's the first time in four weeks. Because that's how long it's been. ONE MONTH. Holy hell. It's gone by really fast.

Vuck Volleyball, I write for NO sports team

2006-09-12T18:46:00.000-07:00

I'm listening to Tracy Chapman in the basement with the hood of my black sweatshirt up trying to write the volleyball story I was assigned to for newspaper. I decided that I'm only going to write until my laptop batteries die or I run out of female power ballads. UGH. A piece of cracker just got sucked under the "V" key on the keyboard. I hope that crumb doesn't affect my ability to type the word volleyball.

Nope. Looks like every thing is vine.

"The Diary of a Young Girl Bowler"

2006-09-11T22:21:00.000-07:00

I killed it tonight. The first game was 203; my average will be about 170 to start. All of my posts about league from now on will be called "The Diary of a Young Girl Bowler" because I'm the only girl and the youngest on the entire league. I'm like Anne Frank in a lot of ways, and in a lot of other ways I'm not.

My team is made up of Jon, Brandon, Troy, and Cloynce; they're all local except for Brandon and Cloynce is a lot crazier than his name leads one to believe. We bowled against a team of men that looked a lot like the twice removed relatives of men my Dad used to fish with. They all brought special bottle jackets to keep their beer cold. Next week I will bring the caddy I compulsively purchased while "cogged" at the top of Pike's Peak, just so I can be one of the guys.

As soon as I got back, Ryan and I had to watch two hours of coverage about 9/11 for our tutorial. A media critique is due Friday. We managed to catch all of the president's address in which he asked the country to rededicate itself to the pursuit of freedom. The best part of any presidential address is the 'analysis by analysts' that follows; who decided that his dialogue was too sophisticated for the American public to interpret on their own the first time?

People are having sex above us on the third floor right now. If the bed springs are this loud a floor down, I can't even imagine what it's like in the bed...

Professor Purcell gave us a piece that she published about the Bunker Hill Monument to read for class tomorrow. It's pretty boring.

I imagine Iowa and Utah have a lot in common

2006-09-10T22:51:00.000-07:00

I went to the Adult Superstore last night with Will, Carter, and Ryan. Should I die in Iowa, I'd die peacefully and with no regrets.

The Adult Superstore's name is actually "The Lion's Den." It's this awesome hybrid of the Adult Shop on Railroad and Love Zone on Meridian and it has the best parts of either store. It had the most extensive collection of videos I've ever seen. As we walked back to the car, I couldn't help but feel like I was in Utah; there's nothing around the Den but a highway for miles and miles. A large white cross is stuck in the ground at the beginning of the Den's driveway. Next time, we're going in the day time so we can take a really campy picture next to it.

I sort of told Kathleen that the four of us went out for ice cream. If you're reading this, Kathleen, surprise! We were going to make a 3 AM Perkin's run too (apparently, Perkin's is like Denny's for the family that farms?) but Carter, who has the car, fell asleep. He'll kill us all before the year's over, I'm sure of it. Left turn yield on green is not clicking yet. Soon, perhaps?

I stole a cookie from the Grille last night and passed it to Ryan over the back counter. I also dropped my Saturday graveyard shift. Things are going to change around here, that's for sure. For example, Erin, Meredith, Jess, and Christena invited me to watch the third season of "The L Word" with them tonight. A friend of Erin's who studied in China managed to secure a pirated copy with Chinese subtitles.

Tomorrow I start bowling in the league. I hope they add another neon beer clock before then because I don't think an establishment should be without at least eight.

The Adult Super Savior

2006-09-09T10:45:00.000-07:00

My parents sent me this picture in their last carepackage. I had hinted at stopping here on the way to Grinnell but I was the only one in the car curious. The building is really small because my mom refused to 1) get any closer and 2) get out of the car. I'm pretty lucky, actually, because she got a great shot of the semi parked on the right. Trucker's get lonely too.

This is the Adult Superstore. It's the only adult shop within 100 miles of Grinnell. Not only is it open 24 hours a day, seven days a week (which means someone or someone's family actually gets to live there!), but their sign on the highway says "Jesus: The Adult Super Savior" followed by "The Adult Superstore Exit ___." I'm going if it's the last thing I ever do.

Midnight shift at the Grille tonight. I hope we break healthcode and have to shut down. Forever.

My fish peaced before I had a chance to name it

2006-09-08T14:25:00.000-07:00

[In honor of Ag. Appreciation Weekend, I'm posting this in green]

I broke my camera. Technically the cement I dropped it on broke it. Unfortunately, all of the pictures from Grinnell Agricultural Appreciation Day are stuck inside its hollow shell. The only proof I have of attending is this tractor postcard. It came in a set of eight in a Ziploc sandwich bag. Each of the postcards depict a different agricultural scene; a local artist produces a different scene for each year.

I decided to post this card from 1999 because it features the gazebo and three of the 50+ tractors featured in the town center. A local band called Route 66 played Vince Gill covers for an hour and a half. Ryan and I could only stomach three songs. We ate homemade ice cream and I was this close to buying flour from a Menonite family at the farmer's market.

Two thumbs up for Ag. Appreciation Day.

I would have attended the Machinery Parade had the Unitarian Universalist dinner not conflicted. Perhaps next year. I talked to a planning committee member in the park. I recommended they sell shirts at next year's event. I think my voice will be heard.

Last night at the study break carnival, I won a beta fish. I knew I would. I was really pleased with myself until I woke up this morning, ready to feed it. To my absolute HORROR, the fish was gone. I freaked out and Kathleen laughed. Nilesh, from across the hall, took it while I was in the co-ed bathtub last night talking on the phone with CatTed about the raunchy Spanish sex poema she was trying to help me translate. Kathleen must have let him in. Nilesh forgot to take the food so during the day today, he must have made a second trip because the food was gone. I decided to let him just keep it because 1) the kid's roommate never showed up for school so he's been alone for three weeks and 2) everytime I say his name, he looks at me like I've mispronounced it. Which I probably have.

Whatever. I'll get another one. Kathleen hated the fish anyway because she didn't want the stress of caring for it. I assured her, I could fly solo on this project.

The cross country team just ran by. Naked. Not kidding.

I donated blood today. I took three stickers and ate all of the Strawberry Fig Newtons at the recovery table. I was a "fast pump" according to Mary, the Blood Center Technician. I asked, and she said she has worked for the Blood Center of Iowa for 10 years. Based on her physical appearance and toupe Easy-Spirits, I would have guessed 50 years.

Rachel is home from Hawaii but stuck in a small basement room in Victoria sans phone and internet. Damn. This one goes out to Rachel.

She has her father's eyes

2006-09-07T08:48:00.000-07:00

TomKat released baby Suri's pictures in Vanity Fair.

I'm baby Suri.

Secret's out.

I'm going to sleep for seven hours this afternoon and then check my mail twice. After that, I'm going to Ag Appreciation Day, THEN I'm going to win a Beta Fish at the Loose Head Carnival and keep it in a Snapple bottle for five years. Beta's live in mud puddles in Thailand, so I'm not expecting anyone to go [FTP] on my ass. Free the Planet is the most feared student group on campus.

I have big "picture blog" plans for this evening. Brace yourself.

Machinery Parade tomorrow, Don't miss it.

2006-09-06T23:58:00.000-07:00

I was hired as the Scarlet & Black's new Assistant Design Editor at 10:30 PM and am just now getting back (it's 2 AM here.) They but me to work straight away because Christena has been sans 'bitch' for an entire issue.

All I do for three hours is edit the three campus events calendars that run in each issue. Christena is graduating this spring so I'm hoping I'll be grandmothered into the Design Editor position and I can train someone else to search the campus memo for seminars, prayer circles, and convocations happening during the week. If you get a chance, come over for the New Orleans Jazz Band Concert next Saturday. It sounds fabulous.

I'm joining a town bowling league. We bowl Monday nights at the Bowladrome; I'm considering renting a locker. Today, for the half-mile walk to practice, I decided to put my ball and assorted equipment into my massive Kelty hiking backpack. I felt very boho-chic.

Tomorrow is the town of Grinnell's Agriculture Appreciation Day. I'm going to eat a lot of butchered hog and sweet corn. Preferably sweet corn wrapped in butchered hog. The flyers recommended we bring our own tractor for the Machinery Parade at 6:30. My cluster is also having a carnival study break and pre-study break pudding drop.

It should all be very down home.

Teach Me Hearts.

2006-09-06T12:48:00.000-07:00

I think this picture speaks for itself. I'm on my way to bowling and this is my bowling game face.

In the picture, I'm listening to Thomas Cunningham's, "Swell," which I hope you all have downloaded at this point.

I should know more card games. I'm willing to learn if you're eager to teach. When I'm in a nursing home, I plan on playing cards all day for money. I will also ask to be called Marjorie, my given name.

Project Runway tonight. One year's worth of tuition says Michael Knight takes it all.

Sobrino, a delicious chocolate drink mix nephew

2006-09-06T09:58:00.000-07:00

I just got back from the dining hall where I enjoyed Kielbasa & Spaetzle Saute (http://www.aaltonet.com/spaetzle/spaetzle.html) with half of my Gender & Women's Studies class because Prof. Alfonzo was out with the flu- we all celebrated minus the woman who looks like my Great Aunt Jean who sits in the backrow taking notes everyday? Instead of doing the reading, I slept last night and read the highlighted sections of the book left by its previous owner. Judging by the passages this person chose to mark, I wager this person was what Simone de Beauvoir would call a "penis possessor."

Lina called. Rachel should be calling soon. I don't have a number for her new place in Victoria yet. I want to visit her right now so we can catch up and laugh at the same stupid shit. Ryan and I watched "Saved!" Saturday night. He seemed to like it but near the end, the substance free kids took over the lounge with the first season of "Lost" on DVD. I like the sub-free kids well enough, but their emotions are just so raw and genuine... If I don't hear anything from Rachel today, I'm calling her parents from the bathroom.

Since I don't like people here enough to take their pictures yet, I decided to post this one of CatTed and me at the Market.

I met a Mormon two weeks ago, she's one of three on campus.

Kathleen made me kill a spider this morning that was living above her bed. I used the section featuring the praying mantis sex diagram from the New York Times. I hope she appreciates what a sacrifice that was for me.

Next time I'm out, I'm buying a gallon of milk to go with the "Cocoa Sobrino, al instante" that I brought back from Dom Rep. It's a chocolate drink mix; sobrino means nephew.

The Counseling Services handbook just arrived. I will be starting complimentary group therapy as soon as possible.

Kathleen's Holiday

2006-09-05T21:25:00.000-07:00

If my leg were a face, this is what it would look like right now.

It's as if a heavily decorated boy scout snuck into my calf and tied all the tendons and muscles into a giant, impenetrable knot. I had to leave the library early tonight because I felt so out of control that I thought I was going to push all the books on the bottom shelf on to the ground for the midnightbrarian to pick up on hand and knee. The midnightbrarian probably would have quit on the spot at the sight of such a mess. Our midnightbrarian is a man. I've found him to be really useful. Not really.

It's been far too long since I've had a fortune cookie... in bed.

You will be handsomely rewarded for your work in mathematics... in bed (The Fookie fortune cookie company of Renton, WA is still trying to pass this one off as a legitimate fortune. Write your senator.)

Speaking of snack food, the first care package from my mom consisted of all the left over snack foods that were in my cupboard pre-Grinnell plus three gum samples from the dentist, plus a crushed package of complimentary US Airlines pretzels from my parent's return flight (and two pair of chopsticks?)- My dental hygienist, Barb, gave me a pamphlet about snacking in college a week before I left. I read it.

Did anyone else read the article in the NY Times today called "It Can't Be Love" about the praying mantis and their courtship with the Chinese mantis? The female eats the male after sex.

I'm for it.

DINING HALL UPDATE: White sauce at the pasta bar today. I put the Washington Apple sticker over my heart after every apple. Kathleen, the manager of the pizza station, not to be confused with my roommate, has got to be 165 years old. They should have a holiday after her and put her fossilized remains in a museum.

"Why don't you just shove it up your ass" and other things I should have said to my co-worker overly sensative about my exsessive use of toothpicks

2006-09-05T16:29:00.000-07:00

I work at "The New Grille." I spend my four hour shifts making grilled sandwiches and wiping sweat from my brow with gloved hands.

Shawnece uses a sandwich skewer as a toothpick at the service counter while Zyme (pronounced 'Z-I'm') restocks Naked. Juices. [Not pictured: Ruth, our merry supervisor. Tuesdays she picks up her grandson from school at 3.]

The hat is by far the most degrading piece of the ensamble. I typically sweat alot when I'm wearing it.

This is the face I made when one girl from the shift before reminded me that "we don't use toothpicks in the penini sandwiches" and the other girl told me that "we try to wear gloves when we handle the customer's food. Just so you know." Bitch, please.

Lamest Question from a customer to date:

Lame Girl: "Could you tell me the difference between your Nicaraguan and your Mexican coffee. I noticed you switched over to the Mexican today."

Me: "No."

That college feeling

2006-09-05T08:14:00.000-07:00

I feel like I'm camping and this is Why:

I walk to the shower wearing all my clothes and leave, still dripping, in the same clothes.

I brush my teeth in front of other people.

The bathrooms have no hand towels or paper towels (or toilet paper?...)

Just like you would the flap-door of a tent, we keep our door open all the time. We don't really decide who comes in and who doesn't, but who locks their tent? I've never been into camping, but I can only imagine the kind of people that lock their tents.

I drink only bottled water, not because I'm a snob but because I'm convinced they give the good tap water to their corn. I'm looking into it.

I live with Kathleen. This is Kathleen with her laptop.

I have to wear clothes all the time, even if it's really hot in my room.

My feet get dirty from walking on my own floor.

I sleep, get dressed, eat, and work in the same 7X13 rectangle of room.

And, there has been a bear sighting...

Galactic Glue, Altoids, Post-its, TicTacs, Snicks (ShannonTM,) Gum, Spongebob Squarepants Foam stickers. Holla!

Cheryll Blair sent me this CARE PACKAGE!!! I love care packages!!! Thanks, Cheryll. You'll be receiving a hand written thank you note from yours truly within the next month. The book store has this really awesome collection of "Entirely Iowa Cards" that have images of barns with American flags painted on whole sides.

LMNOP: Your Favorite Acronym and Mine

2006-09-04T21:56:00.000-07:00

I thought alot about the Olds today. And Rachel. Aloha and mele kaliki maka, my friend.

Kathleen's asleep right now and I'm tempted to take a picture of her so you all can meet her formally but I'm afraid of what she might do if I were to come at her right now with a camera flash- she says she's a light sleeper. Shank me with one of the tooth brushes she won from "Board Game Extravaganza" that she's since filed down behind my back? Maybe.

You know what I should do? Check my mail. I think I'm going to clean up after the mail-free long weekend.

Tonight I hit the LMNOP meeting- Lesbian Movie Night or Organized Procrastination. We watched a really really good movie based in Vancouver, "Better Than Chocolate." All throughout, we ate an entire HyVee large-sized bag of animal crackers. They're like sweet Pringles. I think the makers of Pringles sprinkle crack in the tubes, except not in the "Pizza Explosion" tubes because no one eats those anyways...

I hope the pasta bar has a white sauce tomorrow. I got a little "ill," if you know what I mean, from the creamy red vodka sauce and the white clam sauce they had last week. I think that Alfredo should always be a choice because it's so overwhelmingly popular.

You should come here. I asked, and Nilesh from across the hall said that you can sleep in the spare bed in his room. His roommate peaced out before school started. Just call me before you get here, please, so I have a chance to make your bed and fluff your pillow.

Also, download Thomas Cunningham's "Swell." I can't stop listening to it. Thomas Cunningham must sprinkle his songs with the same crack that the Pringle makers use.

To Kari

2006-09-04T18:06:00.000-07:00

Kari you're a big freak. Stop watching "Sex and The City" and socialize. Love you!
Sucka.

I also joined the Bowling team and have enrolled in a Bowling Class for .5 credits. The Bowladrome has 10 lanes, carpeted walls and five different Budweiser clocks. I bowled a 252 last week. I imagine Iowa turns out a lot of professional bowlers.

It's true what they say about Iowa sweet corn. It's delicious salt and butter free. For the NSO BBQ, a farmer and his wife rolled in a corn roasting machine and served it up hot and golden.

Latest Grinnell Bumper Sticker Sightings:

"I'm Pro Caribou and I Vote"

"Annoy a Liberal: Get a job, Work, and Be Happy"

...Marked by my visits to Wal-Mart

2006-09-04T16:46:00.000-07:00

I just got back from Wal-Mart- my first trip since my parents peaced out two weeks ago. Two weeks ago today. My GOD. Seems longer...

In the past two weeks I have:

Met my roommate. Her name is Kathleen. This morning I broke her favorite blue mug. Awesome.

Applied for classes.

I'm taking: Introduction to Sociology (Professor Fisher has five children, three of whom are adopted. She was raised on a farm in Kansas and knows what it's like to be working and poor which I really respect.) Gender & Women's Studies (Professor Alfonzo wears a belt with images of the naked women that appear on tire flaps.) Intermediate Spanish (Professor Valentin is from Spain. She thinks I'm a big loser and I think it's not my fault I can't understand what she says most of the time.) A Freshman Tutorial called The Politics of Memory: American Memorials (Professor Purcel is a genius- I want to be her.)

Gotten lost looking for my Spanish Lab, gave up, returned to my dorm, and cried.

Learned to treat Pizza as a "side dish."

Decorated my room.
This is my bed. I sleep in it.

This is my desk, my dresser, and my fan. The fan has a remote.

Gone to the library by choice.

Written two articles for the Scarlet & Black- a cross country feature and a volleyball feature. I don't know how exactly I became a sports writer...buuuut, whatever keeps food on the table.

Done three loads of laundry.

Worked the graveyard shift at the New Forum Grille, a snack bar for students open until 2AM during the week.

Subscribed to the New York Times.

Visited Multi Culti Manor twice.

Called everyone I can think of from the bathtub in the Co-Ed bathroom.

Smoked a cigar on the roof with Nick.

Found the Project Runway scene, Thank GOD.

...and alot of other stuff...
My parents may as well have dropped me blindly from a helicopter. Who leaves their precious baby daughter in Iowa and gets away with it? It's getting good here, though. Not great, but good.

Tonight, Will, Dan, Kathleen, and I all piled into Carter's car and went to HyVee (the local equivilant of Cost Cutter) and then over to Wal-Mart where I purchased one "Homie" action figure, two boxes of Cheese Nips, a bag of Special Dark Chocolate Kisses, Microwave Popcorn, deoderant, and two cases of bottled water.

Since today was Labor Day and the country had the day off, I had class and got zero pieces of mail. Laaaame.